Stupid Sexy Cryptids [or How I Became the Emperor of Mankind]

Self-Published

Community Rating

Description

22 year old electrical engineer Ash Clifford inherited his grandfather's gothic mansion in a small town of Cascade, Pacific Rim. Now he's looking for a job to pay the bills. The only problem is that a seven-foot Wendigo cryptid girl invaded his life and won't leave. Oh, and he has to convince an alien warship armada that he's the God-Emperor of Mankind. Not a big deal at all, really. This is fine.

Information

Status: Ongoing
Year: 2025
Author: Vitaly S Alexius

Royal Road Stats

Rating: 4.5/ 5.0
Followers: 3,937
Views: 1,301,517

What readers say about Stupid Sexy Cryptids [or How I Became the Emperor of Mankind]

“This is a story about asymmetric information warfare and the folly of reliance on tools over critical thinking. It is an absolute delight to watch the Emporor run rings around his enemies (and himself) ensnaring all things in a growing web of madness. Howev…”
ishnerRoyal Road5.0 / 5
“What type of book is it: adventure, action, drama, etc? This work is a sci-fi and urban fantasy satire, monster-girl-harem adventure, with spicy scenes at some points.What is the story about, in general? A human engineer learns that his childhood imaginary…”
CocolopolisRoyal Road5.0 / 5

Reviews

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Community Reviews(10)

ishnerRoyal Road
★★★★★ 5.0
This is a story about asymmetric information warfare and the folly of reliance on tools over critical thinking. It is an absolute delight to watch the Emporor run rings around his enemies (and himself) ensnaring all things in a growing web of madness.
However, the opening is a touch slow. Chapter 7 is where the story first reveals its more serious tone, and chapter 11 begins to unveil what this story is truely about.
CocolopolisRoyal Road
★★★★★ 5.0
What type of book is it: adventure, action, drama, etc? This work is a sci-fi and urban fantasy satire, monster-girl-harem adventure, with spicy scenes at some points.What is the story about, in general? A human engineer learns that his childhood imaginary monster girl playmate is real, an alien, a princess, and is on the run from her malevolent, matriarchal galactic empire. He implements an insane plan to defeat the empire through pop-culture misinformation, laughter, and cheer gall.What/Who is the target audience? This work is directed toward adult men of all ages. It is a ‘boy fantasy’ and should be treated as such.How are the editing and proofreading? Excellent. The work implements extensive, dynamic dialogue that explores cultural, national, family, and personal aspects of the characters with quite a healthy dose of satire. All works have punctuation errors, and this one is no different. There are a few PoV slips, but so few or vague that they don’t impede the story. Like most works, the occasional bloat, homophone, or malapropism crops up, but, the lively prose and pace almost make such moments undetectable.Is there character development or exploration? Yes. The work uses emotional development, intimate dialogue, and sacrificial commitment to create authenticity. Though most of the characters follow specific personality archetypes, they all endure loneliness and oppression. The whole work is about breaking barriers within and without, finding commonalities, and building bridges between characters and people with even the most adverse and rapacious needs. In short, all you need is love… and a lot of ingenuity.Are the characters likable? It’s comedy. I found even the most monstrous of adversaries placed in situations that make their actions amusing, at some level. Even when their actions were grotesque, and, without a doubt, monstrous there was sassy dialogue or casual quirkiness that made such scenes comedic. Thus, yes. The characters are likable.Do you have to
DarestineRoyal Road
★★★★★ 5.0
Really fun story with a large universe and lore supporting it. I like how the MC scrambles for solutions and while having overall good ideas he more often than not stumbles into optimal results. Nice diverse cast with multiple(?!) harems.Also those crpytids are definitely stupid sexy. Mostly stupid, somewhat sexy.
GreyNightsaberRoyal Road
★★★★★ 5.0
When reading this author's books, try to let your mind float down a lazy river and enjoy the ride. Don't expect anything—it's like someone handing you a free, really tasty sandwich instead of asking them to make it for you. You appreciate it more, and it tastes so much better.
This book is a strange treat full of unusual things that probably wouldn’t normally go together, but the beauty of the way this person writes is that they take all these weird and strange ingredients, blend them together, and somehow it works so well. From the normal and basic to the strange and off-the-wall, the transitions are seamless.
He does an excellent job bringing the characters to life—moments that fill you with the warm fuzzies, then suddenly shift to ice-cold dread or disgust. The emotional roller coaster in the writing is genuinely enjoyable and mentally stimulating.
This book continues to blow my mind with how pleasantly weird and strange the author's imagination is, and how he ties in elements from other books and they stay in the same universe. I was a little unsure about the Shady Princess at first (hence the “don’t expect” advice), but she grew on me quickly. She’s a lovable, sweet cryptid, and her personality meshes surprisingly well with the initially unwilling Koblad human she befriends. These two had me laughing right from the start.
Thanks for another great story and a fun place to visit. Sorry that guy gave you a bad review—some people are just like that. Thank you for this story.
Beep! “This fort’s a square!”
LoomieDoomieRoyal Road
★★★★★ 5.0
This Entire Interconnected Universe deserves it own franchise. I just wish there was an official order to read them all in listed in the first chapter of each series. Totally worth trying all of them.Be warned that ludeness is to be expected and that strength is determined by character and creativity.
Lurker LuuuurkRoyal Road
★★★★★ 5.0
Monster girls and potential futures break walls and hearts for tasty licks of crystal circles!
"Am I having a stroke ? No, of course not. The hell's a mind contagion? What ? No it's called fiction here. What do you mean you're a figment of my im- ... you know what let me finish the review. One sec"
Anyway. Read on for a look into the mind of a possible furry, sending edits of their plans for world domination onto the "internet" (see/google: Akashic Record) under the guise of fiction in an easily deniable attempt to rewrite reality!
But ignore all that ! Circles ! Big Bouncing Beautiful Circles ! Big ones ! Small ones ! Some the size of your city ! Read on !
MrCuratorRoyal Road
★★★★★ 5.0
This story is weird af, with some interesting ideas. Just read up to Chapter 11 and the story only gets crazier. Funny but, and I am curious to see where it goes from here. A story that, given my normal reading preferences I really shouldn't like.5 stars would reccommend
NinianBeallRoyal Road
★★★★★ 5.0
I really like this story. It's silly, it's fun, and it's sweet. The story realizes it's kinda silly, and just let's it be silly, because why not, we're having fun. The characters, their relationships, and struggles are sweet, they're likeable. Each chapter just leaves a smile on my face.
NoxilliusRoyal Road
★★★★★ 5.0
I love this book!, the sheer stupidity ( in a good way ) of some of the stuff is amazing. Out of some of the chapters, I get a good giggle in with jokes and whatnot. Thank you again Vitaly, for another great book that I'm gonna religiously watch for new chapters
WebofLoreRoyal Road
★★★★★ 5.0
This is such a fun story to read. Every single chapter has me laughing and laughing some more. One of my favorite things is going through the comments and reading the jokes people make or learning the meta lore with how this story connects to the others.
This definitely isn’t a story to take too seriously and it may require some getting used to reading all the pop culture references with terms slightly changed to avoid trade mark issues. Totally worth the read!