The Dragons Predicament

Self-Published

Community Rating

Description

Monsters, humans, war. Within their shielded cities of Technomagi, the humans live their lives in small boxes. Only venturing out of their bubbles with gunslingers or mages trained to defend against the beasts outside. Teleportation to other cities is normal, done through square boxes on rails that are housed underground.

These days, the disparity between humans and us has grown to a breaking point. In a single night: an entire nation of monsters vanished. A cloud and flash of light that all had seen. Only the strongest could survive against their might and stubborn ingenuity. Those terrifying, amazing humans.

We had laughed at first. ‘What possible danger is there? They’re just humans’. That was centuries ago by this point, of course. We all realized the moment we saw that metal tube fall. There is something that only a human can accomplish, through their ability to see light even in the darkest situation.

You don’t win against humans. You either die with them or live to serve them.

Information

Status: Hiatus
Year: 2021
Author: Faelyke

Royal Road Stats

Rating: 3.1/ 5.0
Followers: 19
Views: 13,415

Reviews

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Community Reviews(2)

WeavervaleRoyal Road
★★★★★ 5.0
Story: easy to follow but this is not a sociological tale like foundation. I could not see myself making the same choices as the humans. Which makes it more entertaining.
The author jumps right into the action. Good. I’m left to discover what the heck is happening on my own. Making the reader a detective is a good way to get them engaged. In the second chapter I was already thinking what does this person really want what is your motives behind pushing this issue and I was already thinking about what they could possibly mean for the story as I wasn’t sure which POV -That the story would eventually settle on. Also it’s not clear if the story will settle on one or the other but I do like the romance elements.
Style: I got a lot of white room effects in the first three chapters. Also three chapters for POV’s was a little jarring to say the least I understand if it’s a prologue a prelude. So I won’t takeoff for that.
5/5
Grammar: There were a few “huh?” Sentences that stopped me in my tracks. The author would benefit from doing an out loud read before posting as this is where I found the errors. 4.5/5
Character: Starting in the third chapter there’s a lot more dialogue between characters. as a matter of fact the exposition becomes dialogue rather than just simply narrative which is fine and it help me understand the characters it and then motivations and diametrically opposed views. This is something I do often as a writer. So mad props for making it seem effortless. This is the kind of thing that gets a 5/5 from me.
We start off in third person Omni and then switch into third person type which works in the first character we see is this un named Dragon. We learned later that he keeps kobolds but doesn’t speak with them that much. I’m not seeing too many redeeming qualities here. But maybe that is his arc? Not sure about others but there’s a lot.
Summary/Recommendations: the author would benefit from getting some alpha or beta reader eyes on this with some friends or a
BullerRoyal Road
★★★★ 3.5
Read the first three paragraphs of the first chapter. Just do that. It'll give you a more detailed idea of what this fiction is than anything I can provide.
Going onto the style of the thing, there should be a comment about how conversations are laid out. DO YOU THINK TEXT LIKE THIS LOOKS GOOD!? Well, then you might enjoy it more than me. Couldn't get it working inside my head, and mix that into errors about the syntax and I just did not want to get behind this. 3.5/5 from me. Might have potential but the current stuff still needs work.