New Horizons [LitRPG/RTS]
Community Rating
Description
Three years ago, a new Sci-Fi MMORPG was released by the name of Tutorial. At first many were hesitant to try it because of the odd name and because it had come from an unheard-of company by the name of Universe System, Inc. Mark, as someone always on the hunt for new games, was one of the first to try this new game. He livestreamed his early gameplay and was one of the people leading the masses into the world of Tutorial. This game started on Earth but allowed people to build starships and set off into the milky way galaxy. As many players soon discovered, the game would let you trade in-game credits for real money, leading many to play to pay living expenses. Some soon discovered that there were more ways to earn credits than just killing things and turning in loot including doing manual labor and working to build spaceships. Jobs such as those may not be enough to pay rent, but if you owned a spaceship-building company, you could live very well. Not one for watching spaceships being built, Mark made his money by exploring the unknown, as many were willing to pay for charting data on where the best resources could be mined, or where habitable planets are.Three years after the release of Tutorial, the system came to Earth giving everyone classes and professions, as well as catapulting the humans of Earth into the stars. While there are many stories to tell, this one will focus on Mark as he attempts to establish a section of space where people can find safety and security under his protection.
-------------------------------------------------------------------------[A/N] This is my first time writing a story like this. I have some experience homebrewing DnD campaigns, but this kind of writing is new to me. There is plenty of action, but the story beats are a bit slower coming. I will be posting four chapters per week moving forward as the first few chapters were uploaded all at once and through chapter nine it was mostly as I wrote it. I am open to feedback so please feel free to tell me what I can improve on. I hope you enjoy the story.
Information
- Status
- Hiatus
- Year
- 2023
- Author
- Fireballcharging
Royal Road Stats
- Rating
- 4.3/ 5.0
- Followers
- 42
- Views
- 9,092
Chapters(14 total)
Reviews
No reviews yet. Be the first to share your thoughts!
Community Reviews(6)
- InfinityphoenixRoyal Road★★★★★ 4.5I like how the author went about this. The mc got given a somewhat op race, but because of the class chosen, it won't ruin the story in any way. It's looking promising.
Style: Pretty good for a first-time author. Some dialogue could be split up with action descriptors between sentences, and I think the action scenes could be improved by putting new lines between every two or three sentences to make the flow feel faster, but the feel of a LitRPG is clear in the story.
Story: Full stars for this one. I like kingdom building, organisation running, those kinds of things, but the mc getting his own bit of action makes it much better. Slow burn at beginning, as earth gains new tech and becomes used to the System, but the fact classes and professions like mechanic exists means it won't be annoying to read. I'm getting real Legendary Mechanic vibes from this one, which I quite enjoy.
Grammar: Needs a bit of work. Things like splitting up dialogue sentences, the three dots used for sentences that trail off having spaces between them (as in this: . . . instead of this: ...), little bits like this. Most of the names are also short, so I get stuff like Mark and Mike mixed up.
Character: Characters need a bit of depth, but we've only just been introduced to them, so that's not my main problem. My problem is I don't think we have a decent description of what any of the characters look like yet. All I'm seeing is names with not enough information to form a mental image. At least the military armour is decently described.
Overall: Definitely will be worth reading once a few more chapters are out. Author needs to write a bit more to improve his writing skills, but even then, it will be worth sticking around for the plot itself. I'm interested to find out what cool technology the author will think up, considering this is a sci-fi only novel.
So, in summary... read this yourself to find out more about this novel! - Second_SolRoyal Road★★★★★ 4.5(Note: This is a review swap, and was written at chapter 9)
Overall this fiction is promising, though it feels like it's just getting started.
Grammar is great, no complaints there, and the errors are few and far in-between.
Story is interesting, with humanity being spawned onto a barren world so they can adapt to using skills and such, but like I said things are just unfolding.
The style of the story feels a bit stilted, but it's serviceable.
Characters are a bit on the blander side, but there also hasn't been much time for them to show their stuff yet. The main character starts off with a commander class, and I like that he notes that he doesn't really need to learn combat-related skills himself since most of the fighting will be done by his soldiers. He does have some pretty great physical strength though, so I'm guessing he's going to be forced into battle himself at some point.
I'm interested to see what happens from now on, as there's implied to be many other civilizations for humanity to join once they become spacefaring themselves. It will be interesting to see how a commander-type character handles interacting with other races. - ThatWriterGuyRoyal Road★★★★★ 4.5Overall: I give this story a 4.5/5. It's a well-written story and should give it a shot. It's a unique take on the LitRPG genre where RTS gameplay is mixed with the RPG system. The closest equivalent to it is the video game Mount and Blade series, but sci-fi.
Style:
The author's writting style is good. It's a slow-burn story and it is written well. I'm not good at critiquing this, but I can say that reading it wasn't a chore. The RTS mechanics work well, though it does make me ponder existential questions such as if the existence of NPCs in a real world means there are soulless beings masquerading as humans. The answer is probably that no one has souls, but it still confuses me.
Story:
The story follows Mark, a streamer who played a popular sci-fi MMORPG that would become reality for everyone. It is structured like most LitRPGs with numbers and teams. The plot hasn't progressed much, but it seems like it's going to be a Kingdom Builder for a while.
Grammar:
No massive grammar issues. Any grammar issues tend to get resolved quickly.
Character:
This is the story's weak point. It's still early on so it has time to change. However, there are some issues that should be addressed. Like others have noted, Mark doesn't really react much to his world being turned upside-down. However, that's kind of a staple of this genre, so I'll let it slide. The main problem is the lack of depth to most of the characters. Mark is a typical protagonist. While there are other characters, they don't have much personality yet. There is still time to flesh out the characters, so it's fine. - jerpatchRoyal Road★★★★★ 4.5I like the story, especially the concept that before the new system comes to Earth, we get prepared with a video game. That's just awesome.
What's harder is the story itself is a wall of text and it needs some spacing between paragraphs. If you can ignore that, the story is engaging. I'm excited to see where Mark ends up going with his character. It reminds me a bit of Noobtown since he grabbed the Mayor profession. - Auntie May's Little CousinRoyal Road★★★★ 4.0I am reviewing this story as part of a review swap, but I will try to be as honest as possible.
The premise is interesting. It is the first System Apocalypse fiction I have read that focuses in sci-fi and space-exploration elements rather than your typical sword and magic RPG. The story feels... light-ish. It's not something I would recommend if you like to inmerse yourself in the plot. The narrative feels somewhat bland and the characters all seem a little dull to me. For a first time author, though, it's pretty good, so for those with a little patience and a knack for sci-fi strategy games, it could be an interesting read. - Conrad StokesRoyal Road★★★★ 4.0Disclaimer: This review is written for a review/comment swap with the author.
Part of the review swap with the author demands a minimum of 10k words read, which would be chapter 5 of this story. I wanted to read up to 7 to give this story a fair shake before giving the character a 3 star. The character, specifically the MC, is the lowest scored and unfortunately drags down the story somewhat. Without spoiling anything the MC has his whole world/reality changed and essentially shrugs it off. Furthermore there is very little background on him, other than being a gamer. MC reaction and internal thoughts are important, but he often moves through the story as an NPC would. It makes sense given the setting and theme to "play the game", but there is not any emotional or interpersonal connections that the reader can appreciate as the MC makes moves through the story.
The grammar is something I have no problems with, as with the style. The author in their bio mentions a background with RTS and RPG games, which you can see their positive influence on this story. It is an interesting "system" that is familiar enough to be understood immediately, but unique enough for you to want to learn more.
Ultimately this story is what it says it is from the get-go and if that is your jam, then you'll dig this story. Personally, I liked the style, it is a solid system, but the MC needs work.