JOURNEY

Self-Published

Community Rating

Description

I want a father who scolds me when I did wrong.

I want a mother who loves me unconditionally

I want a brother or sister who plays with me.

If there is another life, I just want a family.

See, the journey of a boy who challenges god to seek what he wants. A tale you never heard off. A tale with joy and sadness of life.

Information

Status
Hiatus
Author
shafi12345

Tags

LITRPGACTIONFANTASYADVENTUREMAGICFEMALE LEADCOMEDYTRAGEDYDRAMAHISTORICALSCI-FISUPERNATURALMARTIAL ARTSSLICE OF LIFEROMANCE SUBPLOTSCHOOL LIFESTRONG LEADGAMELITGENDER BENDERPSYCHOLOGICALMALE LEADNON-HUMAN LEADPORTAL FANTASY / ISEKAIPOST APOCALYPTICREINCARNATIONWAR AND MILITARYHIGH FANTASYSTRATEGYCONTEMPORARYPROGRESSIONATTRACTIVE LEAD

Royal Road Stats

Rating
5.0/ 5.0
Followers
3
Views
2,380

Chapters(64 total)

Reviews

No reviews yet. Be the first to share your thoughts!

Community Reviews(2)

  • YarnSpinnerRoyal Road
    ★★★★★ 5.0
    Yes, I am the author. And yes, I am giving my own work five stars. I truly believe that it deserves it as well.
  • GravityfunnsRoyal Road
    ★★★★ 4.0
    Almost every paragraph after this first one has been said before the author explained to me their viewpoint, and there are good reasons to refute them. Simply put, they are all intentional decisions to make the story more of a journey for the reader, or make it easier to read. In the case of the latter, it doesn't work for me personally, but I now realise that wouldn't be the case for everyone.
    I don't mean to be rude or anything but there are a lot of issues with this story. First, the description is terribly generic, the only thing that's specific to this story is the main characters name. The majority of isekais I've read are trying to make it realistically what people would do. You also need to provide at least a little bit of insight into the character. What her personality is, her goals, and what sort of abilities she develops.
    Similarly, the name is also generic. Maybe if the story was about someone who's just travelling around constantly, which by itself is a fairly common trope, albeit only because it encompasses a lot of possibilites. I really just have no idea what it's actually about though because, again, you didn't say at all.
    The last issue I saw was the paragraphs, mostly that there are none. I was completely unwilling to read more than a few sentences because the lack of paragraphs make it sound stilted and unnatural.
    I think all of these are relatively easy to fix issues in all honesty, just a lot of simple editing for the chapters, and some additions to the description. I would also recommend longer chapters, although I'm not sure whether the first one is just an outlier because it's the prologue.
    I'll just finish this by saying that people should definitely read the story themselves before making judgements. I found that mine were just personal grievances more than anything, and the same will not be the case for everyone.