Betrayal

Self-Published

Community Rating

Description

Heidi Bjornson seems to have it all: beauty, popularity, talent, and a picture-perfect family. But beneath the surface, a darkness simmers, watching, waiting, threatening to destroy everything. A darkness which will pull her down to the deepest depth of despair, spit her out, and only when she thinks she's free of its grasp will it pull her down again. *NOTICE: If you've come to this story from anywhere other than Royal Road, you're reading a pirated and stolen copy. Please help support myself and Royal Road authors by heading over to https://www.royalroad.com/fiction/104091/betrayal and reading there. Thank you*

Information

Status: Ongoing
Year: 2025
Author: Maya Robertson

Royal Road Stats

Rating: 4.9/ 5.0
Followers: 42
Views: 13,993

Chapters(55 total)

What readers say about Betrayal

“From the start it easy to sea how vivid the writing . The way the author describes little details makes you feel like you’re actually there, living in that moment. The story balances light and dark really well, showing both the beauty of everyday life and t…”
smilodon88Royal Road5.0 / 5
“This story is one of a kind and I love how riveting each chapter can be. This kind of story is a rarity on this site and in general You can tell the level of care put into the prose. I'm only a few chapters in and it's already one of my favorite reads.”
AdvPerRoyal Road5.0 / 5

Reviews

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Community Reviews(10)

smilodon88Royal Road
★★★★★ 5.0
From the start it easy to sea how vivid the writing . The way the author describes little details makes you feel like you’re actually there, living in that moment. The story balances light and dark really well, showing both the beauty of everyday life and the heaviness of family struggles. Some parts are tough to read, but that’s what makes it powerful and real. I liked how the emotions felt raw and not overpolished. It’s not a “perfect” happy read, but it sticks with you in the best way. Definitely worth all 5 stars.
AdvPerRoyal Road
★★★★★ 5.0
This story is one of a kind and I love how riveting each chapter can be. This kind of story is a rarity on this site and in general You can tell the level of care put into the prose. I'm only a few chapters in and it's already one of my favorite reads.
CaptainZoomRoyal Road
★★★★★ 5.0
I came here off the back of a recommendation, it's also the first book I've read on Royal Road and I've been hugely impressed.
Betrayal is a dark, chilling thriller told through the eyes of the protagonist,18 year old Heidi.
Things start with Heidi's recollection of a seemingly innocent morning routine but you soon realise that all is not well in her household. The story brilliantly builds up a gradual sense of dread.
The characters are well developed, all have a distinct personality and purpose. They are very well described, you really do come to feel like you get to know each of them on a personal level. In particular, the character of Heidi is very well put across. She's complex and flawed, it's hard to know if she's a good guy or the bad sometimes.
The story is told through Heidi's eyes as a first person point of view. This is done very well, it puts you in her shoes and let's you connect with her on quite a deep and emotional level. This occasional also has the effect of making you wonder where the truth really lies, is she a reliable narrator or is the story she tels, skewed by her biases?
All in all, Betrayal is a compelling read which I would recommend to anyone who enjoys a dark thriller.
Cynthia DawnRoyal Road
★★★★★ 5.0
Overall: This is a story that captures the senses from the very first paragraph. The author uses lots of description to set the scene in a way that's delightful. It's also clear that this story is being told as a flashback, telling us bits about the character's black mood in the present and showing us how events were set into place to show the change from who she was and who she is now.
Style: I like this flashback way of telling the story. The author artfully weaves the present and past to rise the tension of the story. It makes me want to keep reading to find out what happens to the main character and how she goes from a happy, perfect life to something far darker.
Story: This is an engaging story that puts me on the edge of my seat the further it moves forward. It's about a girl who feels happy and content, but as the story progresses we see that she's that way because she's made choices in how she views her life and the things she does. We also quickly realize that even though Heidi thinks she's in a "perfect" life, her choices have actually been hurting the people closest to her. It becomes clear that in not taking responsibility for her choices, she's been able to justify a lot of her bad actions. Oh, and the illustrations at the beginning of each chapter are a nice touch. It brings a little extra pop to the story.
Grammar: I have seen very little in the way of grammar mistakes. The story reads well and flows beautifully.
Character: Heidi is a deliciously complex character as we get to see her thoughts and mindset as she flashes back to the beginning of when things went bad for her. We see how she thought before the dominos started to fall and we get to see her present mind set that's considerably darker, but also aware of her short comings in the past. Then we have Lars her twin brother, who is another character that's broken in terrible ways, but not without reason. It is heartbreaking to see two siblings in such a toxic relation with each other, but it's al
KerryRoyal Road
★★★★★ 5.0
I just wanted to be the first one to claim, I found this gem first🤣🤣
The first chapter got me from the first sentence. The mystery about whats going to happen, the description of the scenes and emotions is beautifully written. The grammer is great. Can't wait for more updates.
M.E. CheRoyal Road
★★★★★ 5.0
Betrayal is a compelling story told through the first-person perspective of Heidi, who recounts her memories in a journal-like format. Set in Oslo, the narrative begins in 1990 and effectively balances warmth and dread, hinting at an impending tragedy. The story is well-written, with strong characterizations and a layered protagonist whose mature, reflective voice contrasts with her younger self.
Engaging Narrative: The journal format and dated entries create an intimate and immersive reading experience.
Complex Characters: Each character is distinct and well-developed, with clear motivations and relationships. Heidi’s flawed yet self-aware personality makes her a compelling protagonist.
Effective Foreshadowing: The story masterfully builds suspense, blending warmth and dread to keep readers hooked.
Strong Writing: The prose is clean and polished, with punctuation and grammar that enhance the narrative without drawing attention to themselves.
The story explores themes of family drama, tragedy, and suspense, with potential elements of horror or thriller. It’s ideal for readers who enjoy:
Slow-burn narratives that ramp up to dramatic or tragic events.
Complex, flawed characters and nuanced relationships.
Stories with a reflective, journal-like narrative style.
I highly recommend Betrayal to fans of suspenseful, character-driven stories. While it leans into familiar tropes at times, the strong writing and engaging narrative make it a worthwhile read. If you enjoy stories that blend family drama with hints of tragedy and horror, this is one to check out.
RainyLiquidRoyal Road
★★★★★ 5.0
The Betrayal is a really fun and interesting read with a lot of intense moments. A lot of the characters felt realistic and the story doesn't hold your hand. It is very mature at times and left me at the edge of my seat while I was reading it. I definitely enjoyed my time and am looking forward to more. All in all I think it was done well and you should give it a read.
Rowdha Al SolRoyal Road
★★★★★ 5.0
Really enjoyable storytelling so far. Although, there aren't many chapters out to give a comprehensive breakdown of where the plot will go and how well the author will handle it. So far, the chapters have been short with plenty of description, and there seems to be a constant undercurrent of psychological tension through linguistic control. Whether this is intentional or not, I don't know, but it seems to work.
Also, it kind of reminds me of House of Leaves.
Samson ChuiRoyal Road
★★★★★ 5.0
Great story, really well written. There are definitely reasons for the tags on the story though, so this isn't a book for your average kiddie who wants a light popcorn novel. Thrilling, gripping, and definitely a little darker than most. Really well written though, with phrases like this. “It was a brutal strike. He moved in a blur of motion, striking, driving the heel of his hand, hard into the centre of my chest with a dull thud. I gasped as the air was forced from my lungs, searing pain spreading outwards from my sternum.” That made me really appreciate the author's writing style. Five stars and well worth reading. Check it out.
Zamora de LeonRoyal Road
★★★★★ 5.0
A complex, character-driven spiral into psychological despair.
I've been following along with this story since its first chapter. Every week, I mentally prepare myself to be chilled by the slowly building dread, and hotly conflicted over whether certain characters deserve what's coming to them or not. I am hooked, I am torn--and if you are a fan of gripping psychological thrills and suspense, then you NEED to check this story out.
STYLE: The prose and descriptions are rich and vivid. Maya's writing style will take you on a carefree journey in one chapter, and have you choking with anxiety the next. It flows, it jars, and altogether it creates an emotional and intense narrative.
STORY: It's a contemporary drama that builds and builds, with foreshadowing that will leave you biting your nails and discomfort that will have you glancing up to make sure you're on your couch and not in Heidi's house. It deals with domestic violence and relationships (both family and friends) in a serious way, which is a rare find on RR--making it unique and I fear critically underappreciated here. But I, for one, am glad to be able to read it!
GRAMMAR: Excellent!
CHARACTER: Okay, this is the absolute crowning jewel of this story. The characters are so complex that you absolutely do not know who you are rooting for. You're lulled into a sense of comfort at times, and then brutally reminded of who you are dealing with. It is that tension that makes this an EXCEPTIONAL read. I love how hung up I get on these characters from a moral perspective.
Overall, I think more people should give this story a try, especially fans of mature and complex narratives. It will take you on the ride of your life...