Vast: The Crusaders

Self-Published

Community Rating

Description

It is the debut night for Owen Walters.

Following in his father’s footsteps, he is about totake part in his first officialmatchas a professionalfighter.Butthings go wrong when he and his familyare attacked andkidnappedby amega corp, the Arden Corporation.

Held captive in theirfacility,and his family now missing, Owen must use his newfound powers and abilities to escape and find his family.But first he must become strong. So strong in fact that the Arden Corporationwill soon regret the day they messed with him.

Upload schedule: M/W/F

Information

Status: Hiatus
Year: 2024
Author: Manny_Shelton

Royal Road Stats

Rating: 4.6/ 5.0
Followers: 232
Views: 34,592

Reviews

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Community Reviews(6)

Ellen TaylorRoyal Road
★★★★★ 5.0
This was a fun, action packed read. It does not wait and leaps right into the story!
I'll go through each section and describe why I rated it what I did.
The grammar is always an easy five from me. I'm not a huge stickler for grammar. As long as I'm not pulled from the story, it's five stars. Small mistakes don't bother me, and I hardly saw any.
Style was also good. It was an omniscient third person, which meant we mostly followed Owen, our main character, but we also did a lot of head jumping. It's a really great way to get the emotional thoughts and reactions from each character, and I always find it a fascinating way to bring more depth to side characters. I was never lost or confused with the head jumping, so well done.
The story was excellent. As I said before, this story did not wait and leapt right into the action. It was almost like a magical school story, yet Owen was being held against his will. So... magical prison where you learn to get stronger and eventually grow to serve your captors. I really liked the premise.
The characters, as mentioned in the style, were really well done. Jumping into their heads for a moment was a great way to get a feel for their characters and who they were. Owen was an intriguing main character, and the side characters, too, brought depth to the world. The side character Will we were just being introduced to, and I was most intrigued to follow his character.
Overall, a great read!
TalkaiRoyal Road
★★★★★ 5.0
This is a great story in the making. I personally like the MC alot. He has that willpower that even when the odds are against hime he's ready to fight, even if he can't win or is facing impossible. Do or die. The side charcters are also well done. And the world building is a bit slow and needs a bit of love for more understanding which should slowly be revealed. Is how it feels while reading. All in all good stuff, give it a go.
White FlameRoyal Road
★★★★★ 5.0
‎This is an awesome, intriguing and action filled book. The characters are great, the power system is simple whilst having depth, the main character is not some hot headed fist first buffoon. But the fights, OH MY GOD! the fights are AWESOME!!! The pacing is also great, not rushed at the same time not lagging behind and the chapters are of a satisfying length. This book is really interesting, do not hesitate to try it.
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‎PS. Manny this is my first review ever on Royal Road, I hope it encourages you to come back to the book 😁.
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emssitumorangRoyal Road
★★★★★ 5.0
I will preface this review by saying that I haven't read much in the way of future dystopian fictions where the corpos rule the world but I've read a couple of manhwas that have these things. A little bit of the story does remind me of Cyberpunk Edge runners in terms of the MC tho so there's that.
Grammar - No problems here for me at all. Passes the Seb's Story to Movie Test with flying colours.
Style - The style is super properly fit to the fast-paced beat by Beat action of the fights. I'm able to scroll down quickly through the action scenes and they form such a great scene in my had. The Pacing is perfect and the characters' voice is perfect.
Story - all in all, I really do enjoy the setting. Have we seen this kind of story before? Yes of course, but the execution is far more imports than the concept and here it's executed great. The only issue I have is that there isn't enough contextualization I feel to how this world works and what the Hell Arden actually does and how powerful it is or in fact how much weight it can throw around in the setting. Are Governments just not a thing so much so that corporations can just go and press gang people and kidnap their families Willy nilly like that? If so, then why is Owen so hellbent on bowing to no authority at all? Doesn't make much sense to me or at the very least, I just need a little more clarification and fleshing out of the world is all. Also on the concept of the worlds magic system, also good if we can get a little bit more explanation on its origins and the like.
Characters - as always, the characters are what I consider the most important back bone to any story and I have to say, the characters are written well. I personally don't enjoy Owen's pigheadedness and legitimately Sky-High Pride... Like, he really needs to be taken down a peg. But at the same time I don't like corpos neither so I'm at an impasse. He's well written, don't get me wrong, I just personally don't jive with people who are so high up their p
OliverBlairRoyal Road
★★★★★ 4.5
This is a great start to this story! Is it entirely original? No. But it's very good.
Author has a great writing style - they have a very spare quality to their words that is very easy to read, and they don’t waste words on unnecessary details. It gives the story a clean, fast-paced quality.
Despite that, the storytelling packs a punch. From the very first paragraph, you’re pulled into the action and right there with Owen as he trains, fights, gets attacked, and gets kidnapped.
Owen’s characterization feels authentic for a teenage boy, which I really appreciated. The author also does a great job of introducing a variety of characters, all within the first five chapters. There's the strong kid, the 'friend' who shows him around, the underdog that the strong kid takes under his wing, and even a girl... Great cast that promises a really good story.
I loved the family dynamics, but there's so little of it past the first couple of chapters. I'm curious to see when (if?) Owen reunites with his family how they will interact with each other. The dad especially I thought was super well characterized and you can see it through the dialogue alone.
The fight scenes were well written! In general, when there was action, it was super well paced.
Where I ended, we were only just getting started explaining the essences, and I'm curious to see where exactly the author is heading with that.
Grammar wise, it was more than enough. I didn't see any glaring issues, though nothing is perfect and it could have used another editing pass. The dialogue especially had some issues with punctuation, with dialogue tags, direct speech etc.
Overall, it’s an enjoyable read and a great start. In the chapters I read, the violence wasn’t overly graphic, though that may depend on your perspective. I do normally read some heavy, graphic stuff.
A note:
- I was not a fan of head-hopping. For the majority of time, it seems that the story is from Owen's POV, and yet at times the author will give the POV of si
iIPedro2803IiRoyal Road
★★★★ 4.0
Great novel to read, hope the author keeps releasing more chapters. The tempo of the story is great as well as the minimal amount of mistakes that can be found within the chapters writing. I like the use of a simple power system and how the main MC is not too OP