The Wizard of Elsewhere

Self-Published

Community Rating

Description

Wizards are a finicky bunch who prefer shuffling about their Libraries, pouring through ancient tomes, or discussing at length the existential complexities of the number thirteen to… just about anything else.

Wizards haven’t ventured on quests in centuries and there haven’t really been any quests to go on anyways.

The Vampires aremostlywell behaved.Werewolves stick to their schedules.Dragons sleep most of the time, don’t steal away virgins anymore and, in fact, find the vast majority of them in this era rather dull.

And the Fae?Well, no one’s seenthemsince Merlin’s time.TheMerlin’s time.

So, when Wizard Barnibus Jefferson Montgomery Barnwinkle, the last Barnwinkle from a long line of Barnwinkles, accidentally trips through an eldritch hole in reality and plops into a land ofFell Doom and Grand Demise, everyone is suitably appalled… everyone who knows about it at any rate.

Quests?They are not vogue.They are not in fashion.But theyarein the land ofFell Doom and Grand Demise.

Wizards, on the other hand are not.And for all that Barnibus has strong opinions on the number thirteen.For all the tomes he’s poured through and scrolls he’s translated from hieroglyphics.For all the potions he’s whipped together by candle light….

He is not atallprepared for a quest.Not a real one.Not at all.

At least he has his hat.

I am going for a quasi serious-maybe-dark setting with heavy dabbing of levity and humor thrown in.

This story is not meant to be a fast burn, so expect some set up! There will be some slower portions, and some slice of life portions, but this IS meant to be an adventure, and I don't intend to have this story meander unduly. That is saying nothing of course about sequels, but I think any talk of that is getting ahead of myself.

I am currently going for aposting cadence of about a week(give or take a couple days), I'll probably solidify that into an honest to god schedule as I progress, but at the moment I am still trying to figure out the rate that works with my writing, editing, and of course, the rest of my life.

Please feel free to leave anycomments and feedback. I am putting effort into grammar, story cadence, imagery and so forth, and so any feedback from my readers is greatly appreciated!

Information

Status: Hiatus
Year: 2023
Author: HattedOne

Royal Road Stats

Rating: 4.6/ 5.0
Followers: 360
Views: 63,097

Reviews

No reviews yet. Be the first to share your thoughts!

Community Reviews(8)

ArensorRoyal Road
★★★★★ 5.0
I'm giving this a five star rating despite the fact that I feel there are a number of issues with this story. This story is sometimes quite hard to read due to the way it needs to be written and at the same time the pacing can feel glacially slow. There are even moments where you're probably not sure what exactly is going on. That's the whole point. A lot of times on this site stories with magic in them can feel very unmagical. Fireball costs 10 mp and does 15 dmg * intelligence on hit. This is a story of magic that is truly other in every way from that and does an excellent job of leaving something in the wings. By the end of the first book/arc I have a gist of how magic works in this story but I'd be hard pressed to give a good description of it. I love this story because of the way it brings me back to when magic was MAGIC and not something so easily boiled down and quantified.
Blorgh the muppetRoyal Road
★★★★★ 5.0
sometimes the author kinda gets too magicy and fuckery with words and sentences and concepts and you kinda glaze over for a bit hoping for it to make sense soon. (which it does very soon and very well)
thats it. the only criticism i got and i really went looking for nitpicks here
Its a story about two mortals fighting an eldritch monstrosity. There is no violence because that would just be so hopelessly unfair. Instead they gotta use wisdom against a being older than modern history.
its a dialogue between mortal and fae. if you want more of that dread feeling when a protag inevitably fucks around and finds out and the real forces of the world come out to play, this for you. all 30ish chapters. fuck me what a ride.
the 2 main characters just got so much plot armour and main character bd energy and yet still are so outclassed it aint even funny. and it really isnt. its bad man.
and its worth reading if only for the ending. tickles your balls with the softest of satin gloves whilst giving you a gut punch that throws you right back to when you were a kid that fell flat on your back and you couldnt even worry about permanent injuries because you just couldnt breathe.
das good shit. recommend a late night binge. (the binge is optional, cause ya wont put it back down anyways)
HaderRoyal Road
★★★★★ 5.0
I absolutely loved the characters in this book! They felt so real, and theyre reactions made sense and were still wildly entertaining. The writing was smooth and kept me hooked the whole time. Just when I thought I had the plot figured out, something totally unexpected happened — in the best way. The fantasy is super well done. Such a fun and surprising read!
SindcoreRoyal Road
★★★★★ 5.0
So far I'm enjoying the story and writing style. The problem is there are only three chapters so far. However, if these chapters are anything to go by than I would say we are in store for quite a story. Be that as it may, I am looking forward to the adventures of the hat!
maroder123Royal Road
★★★★★ 5.0
When I started reading these books I was expecting it to be about mages you know what kind of mages I’m talking about fireball throwing army destroying walking nuclear disasters but these story isn’t about that kind of mages. These is story about proper beard loving hat wearing number fearing proper mages which I never knew that I needed them in my life.
STYLE
I didn’t like style at first because as English isn’t my first language and in most part I cant really appreciate rhyme and rhythms and there are many in these fiction but in the end writhing style managed to grow on me and now I enjoy it very much it gives fiction very unique feeling and I mean it in a good way.
GRAMMAR SCORE
I’m not native speaker so I have higher tolerance for grammar mistakes than native speakers so maybe I missed some but I could not find any mistakes on that front.
STORY
Thes story is mainly about Wizard Barnibus Jefferson Montgomery Barnwinkle last of his line and we should never forget his grumpy old hat and there “Adventure” in the land of fell doom and grand demise. Story is very slow paced but personally I thought it was good choice because story uses its time to set up its world and characters then uses them for very good payoffs.
WORLDBUILDING
Worldbuilding is my second favorite thing about these fiction it is so good I would read book only about mages and witches squabbles it would have been glories and I hope these interaction will continue in future books. on the other hand we don’t really know to much about these new world because of plot and few information we have been given only makes me want to know more.
CHARECTERS
Characters are definitely best part of story and wizard Barnwinkle and his hat have become one of my favorite characters secondary characters are also sufficiently developed and are given there mine arcs and feel like real people but real star of story for now at least is villain who managed to invoke very many emotions in me and in general is very interesting
heinzmuel323Royal Road
★★★★★ 4.5
Liked the style, the pacing, the language, the magic system, the vibe of the characters and world and therefore binged it.
Disliked the placement of the first interlude after a cliffhanger and
the ending, I dislike sad endings and would have preferred another way to solve the issue of evil hat. Would have even liked it much more if he just lost the hat to the fairy instead of everything or not regretted it as much, watching stupidity, even if fits the story is unenjoyable/painful for me. (I can still appreciate the story as art, but Its harder to like it for enjoyment/as entertainment)
MyrddinTheMadRoyal Road
★★★★★ 4.5
I just discovered this story (on Spacebattles) and blew through the first arc in a day.
If you liked Discworld, you'll definitely like this. It's got a similar mix of characters that are easy to love as protagonists, humor, pathos, genuine risk and satisfying triumph. Pretty much every character intorduced has been endearing (or unexpectedly terrifying) while staying distince in their voice and perspective.
I can't wait to see more!
to doRoyal Road
★★★★ 3.5
Quite well written, prosaic and flowery and hints of Pratchet-esque playfulness to everything.
But personally, I'm not much of a fan of poem or song in my literature, and this is full to the brim with it. What's more I never really found myself being drawn into the story, despite quite a bit of the humor landing, as there seemed to be a bit of a disparity between the tone and content that threw me off a little.
So I'd say it's a matter of taste, and it just isn't for me.