The Keeper Chronicles: The Rise of Oracle
Self-Published
Community Rating
Description
In 2066, children born with conspicuous powers are sent to live in highly-monitored group homes until they turn 12. If they don't give up their powers by then, they are sent to a psych ward and sedated until they surrender, no matter how long that may be. Venessa Teller is one of these children. At age 14, she escapes from the psych ward with the help of a familiar old woman, only to be captured by evil interdimensionals, whose activity has been on the rise. Venessa is later rescued by a mysterious man and taken to the headquarters of a secret organization called the Keepers of the Realm. Afterwards, she is sent to live in what she thinks is another group home. Yet, she finds out later that it's so much more.
Information
- Status
- Hiatus
- Year
- 2025
- Author
- Galadriel999
Tags
Royal Road Stats
- Rating
- 3.2/ 5.0
- Followers
- 1
- Views
- 1,192
Chapters(5 total)
Reviews
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Community Reviews(6)
- Morbid writerRoyal Road★★★★ 4.0So first, where I think you did really well. You start with a Strong hook and emotional core. The family dynamic immediately grounds the story: a road trip through cornfields, a child singing, a pregnant mother. The intrusion of a global catastrophe (nuclear missile alert) creates instant tension. The juxtaposition of intimate family detail and world-threatening stakes is effective. Good job
Next the Escalating layers of conflict works. The progression is good.
Threat of nuclear strike, falling debris almost kills them, Alessandra’s premature labor, sudden appearance of mysterious figures, and the hospital scene devolving into government abduction. This steady ratcheting of pressure keeps the reader engaged.
The time skip to Venessa’s arc, her adolescence in captivity pays off emotionally. The psych ward sequences are claustrophobic, and the dialogue with Emily Dante is unsettling in a good way, blurring lines between delusion and secret knowledge. Her escape through broken sedation and explosive powers is gripping.
Good Myth-building Wyverna, Refraction, Dortor, the Keepers.
These figures feel archetypal, borderline mythic, while still plugged into sci-fi tropes like recovery chambers and teleportation. That myth/sci-fi blend gives the world a unique flavor.
Last, I love the blend of languages and perspectives. Switching between Italian and English adds authenticity and disorientation, highlighting the family’s outsider perspective in America. It also underscores the cultural clash at the hospital.
Now the areas you could have done better.
Tone control in 2052. The pacing sometimes shifts abruptly from naturalistic family warmth to melodrama. Example: the barn debris sequence has cinematic flair, but the watch projection calmly stating “Missile disabled” after a terrifying buildup feels anticlimactic. The tonal whiplash risks making tension collapse too quickly. Now all writers have this issue myself included.
Here’s another one I struggle with. Dialogue density. S - Aafiyah QaroziRoyal Road★★★★ 3.5So far, the plot is interesting, and so is the MC. However, certain parts of this story were confusing, and could've been elaborated more. There was some world building, but not enough, as I don't understand how that world quite works. The script formatting is a unique take on the dialogue that, if edited a bit more, could make the story more unusual. Grammar wise, I didn't find much errors. This story is unique in the way it conveys dialogue, and it's style, but with improvement on the story's fast pacing, and worldbuilding will make it more intriguing and easier for other readers to understand.
- NagulanRoyal Road★★★★ 3.5I read story and it was interesting but also a bit confusing. The idea is cool, Venessa is not a perfect hero, she feels unsure and distant, which I liked.
Some parts were exciting and made me want to continue, but the story jumps a lot and sometimes I am not fully sure what was happening.so it feels rushed in places. - MagnificentMikeRoyal Road★★★ 3.0Overall pretty good. I would suggest dropping the (in Italian) after a couple times using it. Trust your readers to follow you, but I do understand clarification when there’s changes to someone speaking English.
I’m really enjoying the premise you’ve put together so far and am looking forward to the next chapters. - Team WraithRoyal Road★★★ 3.0What I like: It's a solid premise. Venessa is a strong female protagonist, and the concept of gods giving humans powers for fun is pretty cool. You have a solid concept here.
What needs work: This is formatted more like a script than it is for prose. Maybe that's your style of writing, but it's a bit too heavy on the dialogue and it's difficult for me to know where characters are, what they're doing, how they're feeling, what they're thinking, what they look like, etc. Which made it difficult to read at many points.
With some reformatting and more description and worldbuilding, this could be a solid title. Happy writing! And thanks for the review! - cursedclarkeRoyal Road★★ 2.0The Rise of Oracle tries to tell a sweeping, emotionally charged story about a girl burdened with destructive powers, a fractured family history, and a destiny tied to secret organizations and interdimensional forces. The attempt is bold and full of ideas, but the execution is uneven, with problems in pacing, characterization, style, and tonal control. Reading the entire issue straight through creates the sense of a writer who wants to throw everything onto the page at once, unwilling to let the reader sit with a moment or an emotion before a new dramatic twist is introduced. The result is a story that has energy and flashes of creativity, but also feels chaotic, melodramatic, and frustrating in places.
The beginning of the issue sets the stage with Venessa’s birth against the backdrop of a missile scare. It should have been a harrowing and grounding origin scene, but instead it feels like an overstuffed set piece. The nuclear missile subplot appears and disappears in a matter of paragraphs, serving no greater purpose except to introduce the mysterious rescuers and to throw in spectacle. The family is sketched too thinly to make their plight gripping, and their dialogue is flat, mostly functional exchanges about the situation. Carlos, the young brother, briefly sparks to life with childlike observations about clouds, but his moment of developing powers is undercut by the “oopsie” tone given to it, which makes a frightening discovery feel like a gag. The chapter ends with government forces ripping the children from their parents, which should be devastating, but again the weight is lost because the family has not been given enough depth for the reader to feel genuine empathy.
The next section, years later in the psych ward, is a stronger setup. A teenager trapped in a sterile, oppressive hospital setting, sedated and monitored, has the potential for real tension and horror. Venessa’s voice here, though still heavily sarcastic, begins to feel more distinct, and Emily,