The Journey of the Illusory Swordsman

Self-Published

Community Rating

Description

In a fantasy world filled with magic and dangers, our protagonist, a young swordsman named Hiro, is born with a special ability. He possesses the unique skill to create an illusion that his sword is immensely big, even though in reality, he wields an average-sized sword.

Determined to become the world's greatest swordsman, Hiro sets out on a journey to hone his skills. Along the way, he encounters companions, each with their own abilities and objectives.

Information

Status: Completed
Year: 2023
Author: PulgaSenpai

Royal Road Stats

Rating: 4.2/ 5.0
Followers: 9
Views: 11,757

Reviews

No reviews yet. Be the first to share your thoughts!

Community Reviews(7)

EveForwardRoyal Road
★★★★★ 5.0
This is a very good start! The tone is wistful and lyrical, like a legend being told. It's all formatted nicely, easy to read. The tale is simple and familiar, and I'm interested to see where the author goes next with it. I almost feel like this is referencing something I'm not familiar with; a source or a genre that I don't really know much about, but I can feel there's depth in here.
Obviously it's your story to tell in the way that you want to tell it. If the style and tone seem right to you, my advice is to stick to it; don't worry too much about people telling you you have to change this or that. If you try to please -everyone-, you won't end up pleasing anyone, especially yourself. My rule of thumb has always been, make whatever changes and edits you feel like, make it the way you want it, but otherwise, don't change if for anyone who isn't willing to pay you money to do so. Be true to your vision! It's hard enough trying to get the amazing things in your head down into simple words on a page, and it can be even harder if you're trying to match up to someone else's idea of what your work should be. Especially if you're translating from a whole other language!
S.nufflesRoyal Road
★★★★★ 5.0
Although this novel starts out very different to other novels on this site in a way that a lot of people may not vibe with, I've had a very positive experience with the author and hearing about the world they're trying to create. This story moves quickly with a lot of action built into it. Things happen and they don't care if you're ready or not, which I can appreciate as a distinct style.
I'd really recommend keeping this one on your follows list at least as an investment for the future. I'm excited for what's to come!
Bab66Royal Road
★★★★★ 4.5
I have definitely enjoyed reading The Journey of the Illusory Swordsman. There hasn't really been anything that disheartened me aside from the short chapters, which the author had tried to subdue, which I greatly appreciated. My favorite part of this narrative is certainly the main character. The author put an impressive exposition that introduces the MC and his aspiration. Even though the story is still in its developing process, and there isn't much to comment on, I still am interested enough to delve into this story purely to see what is gonna happen next with the MC, good work!
Jordan Elias R.Royal Road
★★★★ 4.0
The story follows the life of Hiro, our illusory swordsman, and I really like how chill and easy the story feels. The world building is steady, and the entire story flows almost as smoothly as water.
I'm concerned by how light the story feels, though, but it seems like it's building up to something. King infuses a light comedy into the book, and although he isn't my favorite character, he's my second-best.
Overall, this is a very interesting book. It's one of those books where you would have read a dozen chapters before you actually realized it.
The vivid descriptions of places and people really make the book incredible. I definitely want to dedicate a day to binge-reading the whole book.
lcxiceyRoyal Road
★★★★ 4.0
The story is a simple one of a boy out to prove that his father's swordmanship is the best and rise to the top of the world. A hero's tale as old as time itself. It is that this is the author's first work and there was also mention that they were translating it from their native language. Taking that into account this is a good first effort and although rough definitely worth keeping on eye on.
My biggest critique would be a lack of paragraph spacing and coherent thoughts. On a single line the prose can be talking about and event only for the second sentence on that very same line to switch to an entirely different scene.
This makes a lack of through line for thoughts and it seems like the author knows the story in their head and is skipping through it to the parts they find exciting while not imparting the whole narrative. As the author improves over time and is able to recognize how to fix these issues and with some editing i can see this being a fun read!
ScruffedUpRoyal Road
★★★★ 4.0
So, as of 2023-06-19 the story is really short, both in chapters and chapter length. I will touch on these further in the review but I just want pointed out first and foremost that each chapter is around 600 words.
Style/Story: Combined because of how early on the story is;
So before I get into any of the pro's I am going to point out the biggest issue I have, get the bad stuff out of the way before I get into the good stuff.
-The chapters are REALLY short. I usually recommend someone make a chapter around 3k words bare minimum as it allows the writer to fit enough content into each chapter to actually progress the story, while also making sure that if a 'Table of Contents' is ever made instead of there being 600 entries there are only 40-60 at most. This also applies to the chapter listing on RR, if someone loses their spot somehow and not even the bookmark can help them, if the book has 300 chapters how the hell are they going to find that specific chapter? They might try and eye ball it and just go "well I read for an hour, so maybe chapter 150?", but if they are wrong and they spoil themselves they might just give up on the book entirely out of irritation.
However as it stands each chapter feels like it is 4 paragraphs long and I got through the entire thing in like 3 minutes. As it stands today around 4-6 chapters in this novel would make up a single chapter in any professionally published work.
This can especially hurt the reading experience by pulling someone out of the novel. RR isn't Amazon-Kindle, you don't just swipe to the next chapter, you have to click the button. If someone has to read 4 paragraphs, click the button, read 4 paragraphs, click the button, ETC - It just pulls people out of the book and makes it more difficult to read. (At least for me it does)
Don't get me wrong, I understand why some people use shorter chapters. A lot of writers make 1k word chapters that are basically 1/3 of a chapter so they can lock a few others behind a paywall allo
IndigoSparksRoyal Road
★★★ 3.0
A good story, with an interesting concept. The characters have a solid base behind them, and have good backstories. Apart from the setup, I find that it's all very cookie cutter, though. A lot of generic worldbuilding that isn't treated like a new world for you to step into and be introduced to for the first time, but instead one that you have probably seen before. The writing itself implies that they expect you to have an idea of what the tropes and characters already are, which is all well and good if that's what you're looking for.
I find that there's a lot of telling in this story, especially in the earlier bits, and not enough descriptions to truly put us into the shoes of the main character and relate to them. Dialogue is fine, but at times they jump around and say things that wouldn't make sense for their relationship to the person they're talking to and the situation they're in. There's a lot of promise, though, and is leading towards interesting things.
While it needs some editing and beta readers to truly polish it up, I find that it is capable of being an entertaining read nevertheless with high-action scenes, great power systems and a powerful protagonist.