The Great Calamity

Self-Published

Community Rating

Description

The peaceful villages and bustling towns of the realm are slowly succumbing to an unnatural blight. Crops wither, livestock die, and the once-clear lakes are turning black with corruption. Whispers of dark magic and ancient curses spread fear among the people, and tensions between neighboring kingdoms grow.Luthor Voss, a seasoned witch-hunter, and his young apprentice,Eldon Cay, arrive in the quiet lakeside village ofBrynmere, a place at the heart of strange happenings. Villagers speak of unearthly creatures lurking in the woods and mysterious disappearances.As Luthor and Eldon investigate, they uncover fragments of a disturbing truth: this isn't just a curse but the result of something far older and more deliberate. Their quest leads them into forgotten ruins, where echoes of failed rituals and forbidden magic reveal the mistakes of those who came before them.As the realm descends further into fear and hysteria, Luthor and Eldon must make a choice: follow their duty as witch-hunters or risk everything to stop the spreading blight before it consumes them all.

Information

Status: Hiatus
Year: 2024
Author: Borogrim

Royal Road Stats

Rating: 4.6/ 5.0
Followers: 3
Views: 1,992

Chapters(10 total)

Reviews

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Community Reviews(2)

Chronicles.of.LuminaRoyal Road
★★★★★ 4.5
Overall I like your story and think it has potential to be great with a little bit more refinement.
Style
You’ve created a strong atmosphere, especially with the descriptions of the eerie landscapes and the looming danger. I really liked your map too. The setting feels immersive, which works well for a supernatural story. It would help to mix in more dialogue or action to keep the story moving. Also, varying your sentence lengths—especially in tense moments—could make the narrative feel more dynamic.
Story
The story has a lot of potential, especially with the mystery surrounding the Ur'gluns and the Weeping Woods. However, the plot feels a bit scattered, as there are several intriguing elements introduced (the Ur'gluns, mistwraiths, the wolf’s winter), but they don’t get enough time to develop fully. The chapter where the two women were burnt as witches felt rushed. You started to build on Eldon’s character, but it would have been great to have seen more tension and emotion here, particularly as it’s the first time in the story we see Eldon and Luthor disagree.
Grammar and Vocabulary
Your grammar is mostly solid. Some of your sentences could be simplified for clarity. Simplifying your language in places will help maintain pacing and keep the reader’s attention, particularly in the action sequences.
Characters
The characters have potential to be compelling, but I think they need more depth. Eldon is an apprentice, and Luthor seems like a standard mentor character. A deeper connection between him and Eldon, like showing moments of care or doubt, would make their relationship feel more real. The chapter where Edgar (the drunkard) is introduced, is very dialogue heavy and it can sometimes be hard to tell who is speaking.
BigThinkRoyal Road
★★★★ 4.0
Overall 4⭐
The Great Calamity has all the foundation for a very solid dark fantasy work - witch-hunters, moral quandary, and things that go bump in the night and ravage peasants. After reading up to Chapter 7, some things could use some polish to make this story really shine.
Style 3.5⭐
The overall feel of the setting is there - it reminds me somewhat of the Warhammer universe, with humanity as a whole experiencing a downturn as strange magic and monsters ravage the countryside. There are some good moments - the more dreamlike and supernatural sequences are quite solid, and do a good job of establishing a spooky, haunted town. However, I found the delivery and feel of the book to be harmed at times by the inconsistent pacing and delivery of information. Characters tend to go into roundabout, unprompted monologues without much lead-in or setup, and it takes you out of the narrative.
Story 4⭐
So far, the basic bones of the plot are solid. A pair of witch-hunters going on an investigation, and things quickly getting worse and worse the deeper they go. Great. Lots of potential. I have some issue with certain events in Chapter 3 which felt poorly explained, and it seems to be a case where the author’s vision/reasoning isn’t fully communicated to the reader. The pacing in between major story beats could also use some work to take advantage of “downtime” and deliver more information about the world. Some other questions come up with regards to the main characters' mission - based on how the initial hook is set up, it seems as though more witch-hunters should have been sent out to investigate Aerinthorn, but instead all we get is the dynamic duo.
Grammar 3⭐
This story could use a once-over in terms of grammar. Spelling and punctuation errors came up enough that I felt myself taken out of the “flow” when reading, and that’s my base standard for grammar.
Character 4⭐
The characters are good - the main character Eldon doesn’t come off as annoying or excessively clueless, and i