The Everburn Mage

Self-Published

Community Rating

Description

As a child, Rune Ransford held admirable aspirations of following his father's footsteps by joining the military as a combat mage. These skilled practitioners of magic helped to close the curtain on the much dreaded 7 Year War between his home country of Esteras and the nations that threatened to destroy it.

Possessing a natural aptitude for manifesting and manipulating fire magic, as well as receiving support from his family, his mind had long since been made up. He would be a mage that would make them proud. However, a single, bloodshed night was enough to change his fate forever. Before his eyes, he witnessed every soul he loved perish in an undying inferno. The worst part of it all wasn't that he was helpless to save them. No, what plagues his mind even to this day is that everyone is convinced that he is responsible for their deaths. That he is a cruel devil who walked through a sea of fire and lived. Now, serving in the military as a fully-fledged combat mage, he intends to uncover the truth of what really happened in his tragic past.

What Rune has yet to realize, however, is that there are larger, more malicious forces at play. Forces connected to his family’s untimely demise. Forces lurking in the shadows of the very country he lives. And forces striving to alter the course of Esteras' history.

Brandishing his flames of suffering, The Everburn Mage takes his first step into a world of loss, iniquity, and betrayal.

Information

Status: Hiatus
Year: 2022
Author: Voltino213

Royal Road Stats

Rating: 4.0/ 5.0
Followers: 24
Views: 13,949

Reviews

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Community Reviews(3)

Banner CaygeonRoyal Road
★★★★★ 5.0
The story starts out with an action seen between a mage of some sort and a criminal of some sort. The criminal isn’t well described, but it doesn’t really matter. As the first chapter progresses we get more information about one of the MCs and their abilities. He’s later referred to as Rune. There’s not a lot of info to go on (a good thing) to set the timeperiod, other than dumpsters and buildings.
In the next chapter we read there’s a car, and then the story breaks into an almost full on Police Procedural, which is utterly delightful. Sabine, Peter, et all are hanging our headquarters shooting the ‘$4i7” and the dynamic really really works. I know there’s been works before that attempt to turn mages into not rob wearing gandalfs, but I can’t recall one where they were basically detectives. I think it’s great.
Grammar: A few minor issues here and there, but nothing jarring.
Style: This is a cool world. I’m still not entirely sure what era it’s meant to recreate, but it totally feels like an 80’s or 90’s cop city. Think NYPD Blue but with magic police officers.
Characters: The characters are great, but I think I’d like to get to know them a bit more earlier, or have a few more drips of backstory. Rune is the most developed at time of review, but I felt like i wanted to know more about the others as well, considering they seem quite central to the story.
Overall: A solid story, cool genre overlap that is well done, and likeable characters.
I think the only suggestion I might make, is to shorten some of the intense police-y dialogue early on. It can be tough to keep track of who’s talking at points, but it does lend itself to the style of police banter.
CKJ5Royal Road
★★★★★ 4.5
Story 5/5: I really enjoy the concept of the Everburn Mage. The story follows the MC, Rune Ransford, who serves in the military as a combat mage. Rune is trying to balance his duties and life while uncovering the truth behind his family’s demise. The Everburn Mage is a third-person story with multiple PoVs, which are huge pluses for me.
Style 4/5: I enjoyed the way the story is told. I also enjoyed the descriptions used for the magic and the world. I did find the overuse of adjectives and adverbs distracting at times for simple actions.
Grammar 5/5: I did not feel that there were many grammatical errors in what I read.
Character 4/5: I did enjoy the characters and their motives. However, at times their interactions with one another did not feel natural. They often would escalate in conversations only to continue as if nothing happened when it seemed like they were yelling at each other seconds ago. That is not to say that the characters are not interesting because they are, but I often wondered why they interacted with one another in such a fashion.
Overall 4.5/5: All in all, it was a fun read with an interesting world and characters. There is plenty of world and character building and a solid fantasy story.
NonbinaryFineryRoyal Road
★★★★ 4.0
Disclaimer: This is a review swap.
Style and Characters: Everburn's story takes a lot of its beats from urban fantasy and cop stories. This comes with both good and bad. A police procedural gives a story good structure and if what you want is a bunch of people deconstructing and figuring out a criminal's motives and modus operandi, this will scratch that itch. Likewise, if you like somewhat moody urban fantasy, I'd definitely give this a shot.
If you, like myself, have read and watched enough shows of this caliber, you can tell where some of it is going and some of the police-style banter and dialogue can become a little too much.
Rune, the MC, clearly fills the Loose Cannon shoes that most Police style MCs tend to fall in, but Rune himself is fairly entertaining as a character. He is someone who has some emotional baggage and a past that makes him a social outcast in many circles while also searching for answers and revenge. In that regard, he is very much your Urban Fantasy MC to a T. But he is executed well, so it becomes a strength for the writer.
This is most noticeable if you put Rune next to other characters, who aren't quite afforded the same sharp portrayal, and the villains who so far felt a little lackluster in their presentation. For what is an urban fantasy style story, it could do with humanization and depth towards the non-police elements of the story.
If you read and like urban fantasy with police flavor, chances are you will like this one. The writing is solid, the pacing is overall pretty sharp and the author has some pretty excellent grasp of how to write Rune, the MC's way of thinking and seeing the world.