The Cold Between Stars

Information

Status

Ongoing

Year

2023

Author

Firniel

• XIII: The Mind of Man
  Oct 26, 2023
• XII: The Betrayer
  Oct 21, 2023
• XI: Unbalanced Scales
  Oct 16, 2023
• X: An Unprepared Escalation
  Oct 11, 2023
• IX: Of Light and Dark
  Oct 6, 2023
• VIII: Here We Stand
  Oct 1, 2023
• VII: A Light to Guide Us
  Sep 25, 2023
• VI: Will and Testament
  Sep 20, 2023
• V: Counsel and Keeper
  Sep 17, 2023
• IV: Siren’s Lament
  Sep 12, 2023
• III: The Predator
  Sep 9, 2023
• II: Through Dreams Darkly
  Sep 4, 2023
• I: Memento Mori
  Aug 31, 2023

Reviews

Community Reviews(10)

• PlusiaRoyal Road

  ★★★★★ 4.5

  Overall, there is something almost other-worldly about this narrative, something ethereal and not necessarily grounded.
  Herein lies my biggest issue -- the time skips, changes in narration and some repetitive, if excusable, phrases (mostly in italics, showcased as our protagonist talking, to others or herself, instead of an inner monologue or physical actions. Show, don't tell.)
  The story, while a little hard to follow, is one that is fascinating and certainly seems to build and (hopefully) become more cohesive.
  The characters, while well-written, almost jumble together. To me, they fall just a tad flat. There was a strong hook in the opening chapters, but with the repeating dehumanization and detachment to humanity showcased in one character, it's hard to pick up anything other than this character is animalistic. It feels so though the scope of the character and her other traits and traumas and emotions fall to the wayside over rage and instinct. Perhaps, re-humanizing this character with an exploration of her grief, as both plot and character development, would suit the overall narrative?
  The biggest thing that keeps me coming back is the prose. It is engaging and well-thought out, if sometimes a little too verbose. Nothing wrong with that, of course -- but there are always ways to tweak metaphors or shorten allusions and similes to better suit the text.
  Overall, it's something I would recommend, but perhaps I would perceive less of these issues in later chapters. Only time will tell.
• AurathasRoyal Road

  ★★★★★ 4.5

  Grammar: Let me preface this by saying that you aren’t going to run into any issues with the grammar that will really be all that jarring or take you out of the story. That being said, there are some grammar issues with an occasional missing word or punctuation. Nothing at all major.
  Story: The story gets off to an interesting start and can feel a bit confusing, but I am not sure if that is deliberate or not. Regardless, I feel like it adds to the sense of mystery and atmosphere of the setting. As for the pacing, it feels good and gets off to a quick start. The setting is also a big plus for me, the world that has been created is both interesting and a bit creepy.
  Style: I’m a big fan of the writing style used by the author. They focus on getting the point across with little or no superfluous details. The author does a great job of creating the atmosphere, which can often be quite difficult to pull off.
  Character: The characters so far are quite intriguing and I can see a lot of potential from the varied cast that makes me want to keep reading and see where their stories go. In all, recommended!
• Allen_ClayRoyal Road

  ★★★★ 4.0

  I see that this story does not seem to be conventional. It is confusing to read by just fragments and you need to seek answers through the chapters themselves. You would have to understand what is going on by finding out the perspectives of each characters as described in the story.
  The pacing is a bit slow for me. However, slower pacing means that the author had time to develop the plot which is not a bad thing for me.
  Grammar is OK and the sentence were readable.
  Other things worth to mention  is the shifting and different point of views. I am not saying it is a bad thing but I say it is one of the features of the story that advances the narrative.
  Thank you for introducing me to your story. I enjoyed reading it!
• Fudge EsqRoyal Road

  ★★★★ 4.0

  Hi! Let me preface this review by saying I am reviewing up to Chapter: The Eyes of Man. My review may or may not apply further, but the author seems very responsive and cares about his work so it’s possible the issues will be solved shortly after this post is made.
  Character: 3/5
  I don’t think any of the characters are bad but exactly, or even that badly written in terms of their characteristics. It’s the dialogue that comes off wanting. 90% of the time it is difficult to distinguish between character dialogue and most of that dialogue matches what I’d imagine a young adult to be saying, maybe even a teenager’s way of speaking. I know character dialogue can be really difficult but I’m sure this author will pull through with the changes!
  Story: 4.5/5
  Although the resulting writing style hides the story a little, I can tell that there is a wildly epic tale here. It play on and characterizes life and death, the importance of existence and how it is taken for granted. To not know what you have until it’s gone.
  Style: 4/5
  The style is a bit confusing when combined with the story narrative it’s trying to portray. The themes are so heavy and philosophical that I believe the style could do with some simplification. Hard themes written in a vague and complex way usually just results in people being lost along the way.
  Grammar: 4/5
  Honestly a bit of quotation errors and clunky sentences/ dialogue but I honestly did not see any  spelling errors or grammatical mistakes that break immersion. The points I’ve docked are wholly due to the quotation errors mainly earlier on in the story and swapping between James and Silas instead of sticking to one.
• d.c.brums23564Royal Road

  ★★★★ 4.0

  Overall: Would recommend to some who are looking for a different type of story. The ideas of the afterlife and death are intriguing in this one.
  Story Score: It is a little slow in the beginning, but as the story picks up and moves towards the plot. It begins to pull itself together. I'm wanting to see where this is all heading with the spire and all (trying not to spoil anything).
  Style Score: The style is actually pretty good, very different from what I'm used to reading. At first it was hard to follow, but if you stick with it, it flows.
  Grammar Score: Overall the grammar is great and I only found a couple of misplaced words in the earlier chapters, that changes in the later chapters, as they are much better. Either my brain did not notice grammatical errors or they were not there.
  Character score: I love each character individually though it is hard to remember at times the character's names. Like James goes by Silas, but is possibly Virgil? To be hones, the names are the hardest to keep track of for me save for Beth and Luxcious. This actually helped me reflect on my own writing when dealing with characters with multiple names and titles.
• lar.larRoyal Road

  ★★★★ 3.5

  If you asked me why this book is titled "Cold Between the Stars" I wouldn't be able to tell you but we can all still agree its a lovely title for a book to have. That is the summary for all other aspects of this book for me. It's lovely writing with interesting concepts but I can't make heads or tails of it.
  I was left scratching my head more than once and had it not been the helpful comments I don't think I would have grasped half of what I was reading.
  There are a few reasons it confused me so much.
  1. Its not a conventional tale.
  A. Don't go into this story expecting a grounded setting with linear storytelling.
  B. The main characters are unapologetically killing humans and do not show any justifiable reasons for doing so. So don't expect them to be sympathetic enough for you to root for them.
  C. There are drastic transitions between chapters where we hop from one location to another.
  2. The author does no handholding
  A. The usual problem often discussed are stories coddling their readers to death, making sure everyone is on the same page. This book has concepts I don't understand and did not find explanations for. What exactly is Bethyinine? Is she a god, a beast. Where is all this taking place? Why is there a clone of James/Silas? Why does James have bones made of metal? Since there a holographic projections is this sci fi? I thought it was medieval fantasy at first with the bartender at the tarvern.
  I'd say the worldbuilding is a bit barebones and needs to be expanded upon for readers like myself.
  3. The plot?
  I mostly overlook parts of stories I dont understand (setting, magic, characters) if the plot is engaging with hooks. The inital hook of resurrecting James is resolved early and even then it was treated as an afterthought because Bethyinine was more interested in hunting and killing people (her grief is understandable but not an excuse) rather than progressing the plot.
  The story shifts focus to James after his resurrection but I was even more confused wi
• LacunyktRoyal Road

  ★★★★ 3.5

  [This review was spurred by a forum post.]
  The Cold Between Stars is a bit of a rollercoaster, at least from what I read. Up and down, back and forth, around and around. I don't mean this in a bad way, though; rollercoasters can be very fun! And the plot, in theory, is definitely fun. My intention behind this analogy is the structure of the narrative itself; the execution. The pacing is built in such a way that the story moves on before enough of a foundation is established. It's a bit of a whirlwind; it's hard to find your footing. Perhaps this fast-paced mystique is intentional. Perhaps information and clarity is scarcely handed out on purpose. However, an esoteric and/or unconventional fiction stutters when coherence is sacrificed for the sake of mystery. It's a fine line, and a difficult one to balance perfectly on, no doubt.
  A reader can glean some meaning from pretty much any piece of writing, no problem. The question is how much free rein the author is willing to give them, how far they're allowed to stray from the intended path. There are thousands of ways to structure a story, of course. It just felt a bit like the author's plan was to introduce everything there is and then explain everything afterwards, rather than maintain a building-blocks motif of detail, lore, detail, lore, detail, lore. A push-and-pull unfurling is typically more conducive to a natural story progression. So deviating from that is not inherently a bad choice by any means, though it does make it quite easy to get confused. The characters provide minimal insight as well, and can sometimes feel unnatural or obsolete. The confusion does wear off somewhat in later chapters, assuming one lingers long enough in the opening act to gather enough transparency, but a certain sense of vacillating fickleness forms in its place. The best way I can describe this is like getting into a car – albeit a very snazzy car – without knowing where you're going or what the point of the journey is.
  I caught man
• PixxieRoyal Road

  ★★★★ 3.5

  Okay, although I find the story a bit interesting, I feel like the grammar and the way the story's been told caught me off guard. The paragraphs are way too long and the periods in some dialogue should've been replaced with commas, especially on Bethyine. Now why's Bethyine's dialogue in quotations is beyond me. The constant shift of POV in every few chapters is a bit annoying too. Other than that, great story, man. And I hope you keep up with the good work.
• TheGreatGazpachoRoyal Road

  ★★★★ 3.5

  I share similar sentiments with others as I struggled to understand the direction in which the story was going. I can feel the type of aesthetic the author is trying to convey, but the overall story doesn't really hold my engagement well to bolster it. While the characters do have concrete motivations, they aren't particularly compelling to want to read further into.
  The idea of this seeming Limbo space / a space between life and true death is interesting. I would say also work on scene transitions that retain the same POV character; One instance with Bethyinine being at a funeral to then being on the sea floor felt especially jarring. Bethyinine's reveal to be a siren also felt jarring as there were no references or hints to such nature within the first few chapters.
  With tuning and tinkering, you could make this a fine story.
• CasualEvilRoyal Road

  ★★★ 3.0

  The Cold Between the Stars works off an interesting premise. I won't spell it out since it is a bit of a spoiler.
  You do not start on the same line with the characters as soon as the story begins - they have lived a life before the words came to talk. Though, it may be confusing trying to piece everything together. You are not expressly told anything and have to infer from the characters and their surroundings, and that makes it more engaging.
  The style is sombre and serious, selling quite easily the feel the story is meant to have. It fits in most especially because the story began with death, or, what can be loosely described as a funeral of sorts. The tone of the novel is conveyed very quickly.
  But.
  While I can see what the author is trying to do/going for, consciously or otherwise, I would not say that it is pulled of well. The actions have a certain gravitas of history, yes, but the pacing quickly comes in conflict with the tone. There is no flexibility for different types of scenes. As a metaphor, the same tone is used in describing a funeral as well as, say, an exciting reunion. In as much as the 'gray' tone is most fitting, a painting thrives off different shades of gray. This compounds things, in a way, because while the characters have motivations, they just come across as bored to us and sometimes their more intense reactions seem to come out of left field.
  Secondly, there is a rather noticeable sparseness of descriptions and a heavy focus on action that haunts the story and jostles the writing. Especially when things are meant to be dicey, the writing and the little descriptions of the character's state does nothing to reflect that in any way, making the actions of the character and what is going on seem flat, like it happens every Tuesday. It also makes it hard to visualize things. That is also what compounds the difficulty of trying to piece the past and relationships together. Very many things are left out for a focus on action.
  While I do find it rig