Shameless Overkill

Self-Published

Community Rating

Description

When magic and mythical creatures return to Earth, The System is sparked and woven into the fabric of reality. Seeing how poorly humans handle change game savvy individuals are selected as System Support Staff and tasked with getting the clueless masses up to speed.

Follow Gus as he and his role playing buddies start a Guild to get levels, laughs, and LOOT.

This is a light hearted story focusing more on friendship and rivalries than romance and vengence.

[participant in the Royal Road Writathon challenge]

Information

Status: Hiatus
Year: 2021
Author: BeardedBook

Royal Road Stats

Rating: 4.0/ 5.0
Followers: 5
Views: 1,024

Chapters(4 total)

Reviews

No reviews yet. Be the first to share your thoughts!

Community Reviews(2)

devblazerRoyal Road
★★★★★ 4.5
Read up to chapter 4 and reviewed.
That was...
I don't know what that was. It was fun, zany and extrememly tongue in cheek. This is the kind of story that is a light-hearted and a wild romp through game-apocalypse territory. The story unapologetically does not give a Texas f**k and barrels forward with the crazy hijinks of Gus and friends.
While this sort of story is not actually my personal scene (I like more grounded stuff), I can still review it on it's own merit. The primary one being of course, writing style. The writing is very stylish and feels like it would be right at home in a comedic version of duke nukem.
There is also a plethora of cultural references for those who like that sort of thing. It also feels like Texas being written about by what the rest of the world thinks Texas is actually like (I am saying this as one of those same ignorant outsiders myself).
The characters don't have much in the way of development yet, given only four chapters out and it feels like they won't receive much anyway. But that's okay, it's not really that kind of story. This is about wild people doing things for fun, with flair.
The never ending crazy continues and our characters roll with the punches as we fumble through skinning slimes and bird poop attacks. Enjoy.
Turtles are different from TortoisesRoyal Road
★★★ 3.0
I've read up to chapter four as of this review, and the authors writing style has been my biggest hurdle with enjoying the story.
Grammar: The grammar is all technically correct, or at least as much as it needs to be for this story. What isn't though, is the prose format. Sentences feel repetitive, and the overuse of the same couple structures again and again makes the large paragraphs feel very slow.
Story: The story seems to be rather fast paced, with a lot happening in this short amount of time. I find myself somewhat struggling to keep up, as details are often lost in the info that covers the screen as I scroll.
Character: Fine, is all I can say. Perhaps somewhat unrealistic with how quickly they all adapt to the situation despite the drastic changes, so I don’t feel very attached to any of them, but then again it was been only four chapters, so perhaps that it to be expected at this point.
Style: This is the worst area. Events are rushed though, and the large dumps of text all together makes it feel as though the story is rushing by my head without giving me time to get engaged. The author here could greatly benefit from breaking up paragraphs into smaller sections, not cramming so much into one chapter, and adding more variation.
This brings me to another problem, which is the massive infodumps of system information, which in some chapter almost feel as though they take up more than everything else combined, while most of them contribute little to the plot or characters.
Overall, I think there may be some potential, but the writing style is currently just not nearly cut and polished enough for me to continue.