Lucky Shrike: Book One

Self-Published

Community Rating

Description

Adahlia Highstreet is a bright, ambitious preteen-- with a soft spot for the fantastic. Unfortunately for her, she is often the target of a group of older girls.

After narrowly escaping the bullies' clutches; Adahlia wanders into the nearby woods. There, she meets a magical new friend. One who will change her life and love forever.

**********Book One: is complete with the exception of any minor revisions.*********

Book Two: Might of the Monoch - is on a hiatus. Need to get into the headspace for round two. Got a cover already though. I'm happy about that (gives me inspiration).

Information

Status: Completed
Year: 2023
Author: Kayceanova

Royal Road Stats

Rating: 4.8/ 5.0
Followers: 4
Views: 26,783

Reviews

No reviews yet. Be the first to share your thoughts!

Community Reviews(1)

TheWolfWriterRoyal Road
★★★★★ 4.5
I tried to get into this story, but ended up stopping midway. It's not that I disliked the story in general--plot, characters, and creatures were all pretty well built, in my opinion. My problem was the way it was written.
Part of it is probably my fault. My brain is hardwired for past tense, either first or third (I have yet to read a story in second present tense). I just can't register present tense properly--almost like my brain just says, "NOPE!" But I feel like the story would have degraded a bit if it was anything but present, so don't change it just for me.
Another problem for me was the grammar mistakes. I got a note from the author, however, saying that they would work to improve those, so I have my hopes up! But it wasn't just that--I feel like there wasn't enough description of the surroundings or background in the world. I was left going like "What? Huh? Where? What does this look like? How should I picture it?" Most of the time, my brain can fill in the blanks. But this time, I just had a lot of trouble.
I'll still give this story a 4.5 star, however, because I feel like the author put a lot of effort into it, and is trying to improve step-by-step. I'll try to finish reading it, but first I might have to rewire my brain to present tense!
Good luck, Kayceanova! :)