Holy World

Self-Published

Community Rating

Description

The old world has ended in blood, fire and chaos. The new one is filled with endless possibilities but just as much blood.Andrew's enigmatic abilities and desire to grow stronger in order to protect his new family will bring his journey to an early end or further than anyone else before him.[System booting...][Welcome, host!]...[Quest Completed: Holy Power Acquired!]"Hah, that surely was an easy one"[Additional Quest: Kill a Guardian of the world]"Ah, I spoke too soon.."

Information

Status: Hiatus
Year: 2020
Author: EmpRabbit

Royal Road Stats

Rating: 4.3/ 5.0
Followers: 54
Views: 17,644

Reviews

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Community Reviews(6)

Camille d'irithylRoyal Road
★★★★★ 5.0
It's a novel that you should read because it's a very good read.
The story has tons of potential, and its atmosphere is perfectly suited to the style of story the author wants to tell, it's dark and full of suspense, in which Aisha and Andrew fight for their survival, but also and especially for their future. The menu of statistics is well done and not stifling, unlike many stories of the genre, and the story itself flows smoothly from one chapter to the next.
The style and mood is somewhat reminiscent of that found in xianxias/wuxia and other novels of the genre. It has that indefinable something that makes us enter the story directly in a pleasant and comfortable way. It's very fresh and easy to read.
The narration is direct and precise, which works well in terms of the rhythm of this kind of story. I think some parts of the action scenes may be more descriptive, but I know how hard they are to write, and this is the author's first work, so I have no doubt that as the author progresses, they will only get better. To become epic and grandiose.
Although you may be confused as you read the first chapters, since these, including the prologue, somehow tell why the world will be the way it is in the rest of the story. It's an interesting idea, but the fact that it's not clear who the protagonist is, who's great, makes it a little less engaging at the beginning. It would have been easier if the prologue had been combined with Chapter 1. Andrew is the kind of protagonist you can care about or love easily, and you take great pleasure in following his progress or his little slice of life moments.
Fresh and pleasant. You should give him a try.
D.M. Rhodes (Razzmatazz)Royal Road
★★★★★ 5.0
This one got me good because I started reading chapter 1 and then by chapter 2 I was like “Well that escalated quickly” but in a neat way. The story follows Andrew, a young man who is off to rather rough start at the beginning of the story and a girl named Aisha. The author has been very consistent about updating every day and sticking to their word, so bonus points for that as well!
There are noticable Litrpg elements in the story but the mood is for sure a little on the darker side which is contrary to the usual bright and overly ‘anime happy’ genre. The narrarion is on the mark for the most part. At the beginning I wished the author would show more and tell less but then I noticed a good change in that regard around the middle when I think they themselves noticed as well, so the style works out nicely. There are some shifts in perspective here and there near the beginning which are rather aburbt, but given the nature of the intro it makes sense so I actually enjoyed the quick back and forth.
The characters are likable and their actions are understandable I’d say. I would enjoy a little more ‘quiet time’ we each of the characters, but honestly the story is still early and I’m sure we’ll get to know them better anyways over time.
The grammar is on point, I didn’t manage to find anything out of place or odd honestly so not much to say here.
All in all I can say I enjoyed this one a lot so far. If you like a little touch of dystopia, and you like a little spice of litrpg drizzled over your action/fantasy story then you’re in the right place!
D.N. NewynRoyal Road
★★★★★ 5.0
Holy World by EmpRabbit is a very good read for me so far, with tons of potential. The story is gritty, dark, and full of suspense, with a foundation laid out right at the beginning chapters and a smooth transition to the fight of Andrew and Aisha for their lives. The stat menu are well-done and not overwhelming, and the story itself flows nicely from one chapter to another.
The style is direct and to-the-point, which works well with regards to pacing for this genre. I think a few parts in the actin scenes can be more descriptive, but it's each to their own. However, I agree with the other reviewers that the first chapter should've been a prologue.
The characters are relatable, though they could've been more fleshed out. I think they need to have a bit more personality, something that sets them apart from the rest.
The grammar is fine. The author has a good grasp of grammatical rules, but beware of tense shifts in general. There are some punctuation errors, but nothing too distracting overall.
All in all, this is a good book for fans of dystopian novels with a litRPG twist! I encourage you to try it out!
FirinenRoyal Road
★★★★★ 5.0
What i have read so far is pretty good and also keeps a good and consistent writing style. The main character has a little sister with which he adores and wants to protect but also keep a head on the immense potential of his sister. Bit of even without amahing potential his affinity is very rare and he has the system. I find the conversations between the siblings really good and the infinite possibilities the mc has with the system. The authorland takes this story serious and does not rush which keeps the quality in the story and doesnt make it boring. Fans of system based stories and cultivation are recommended to read this!
WinnieSallowRoyal Road
★★★★ 4.0
The story is intriguing and has great potential, but the execution needs work.
Story: First off, this part is good. The story is exciting. It looks like it’s going places fast, and the pacing is right for Royal Road. However, things would be improved if some of the backstory was saved for later. We know Andrew – he’s the guy we’re following, but we’re told a lot of what his childhood was like, when I think we could have been shown. Maybe, in a short chapter where he meets his mentor or at the tail end of a prologue.
Now, people hate to be told to show vs tell because it’s vague advice. So, to the author:
There are also a lot of other characters right in the beginning that distract from Andrew. It feels like false starts. Those characters are important, but I feel their part could be condensed into a prologue. Then, they could be introduced again later as Andrew encounters them. It feels like the story works best with a third person limited perspective, so jumping around too much in the beginning could be disorienting to a reader.
Style: There’s nothing really wrong with the style of writing. It’s direct and avoids flowery language. I consider those things to be pluses.
Grammar: There are some tense shifts, and a couple of other issues that trip up reading. I think an extra read through of the chapters would be in order. Maybe something to think about after the challenge (I reviewed this when it was updated daily, during the Writathon 2020).
Character: Andrew and Aisha are the main characters so far. I haven’t seen a lot of their personalities just yet, but there’s no issue with them as people. I think they just need stronger development.
I think the story has a lot of potential, and I do think it will attract readers. However, it could attract more with a few revisions, especially at the start.
ZydrateRoyal Road
★★★★ 3.5
I guess you could call my a more classic literature reader, so my mind was accustomed to that.
My immediate thought was the problem with certain styles of writing. The first, the numbers are just typed out rather than written. To me, that should only happen when the number gets too large. "Twenty-one" is not hard to read, while "twenty-one thousand six hundred and seventy four" is actually very difficult to visualize as "21,674", so it'd be fine to just throw the number itself out there. For me, that was a red flag. Then the internal thoughts of characters were utilized within brackets when I found distracting, as I don't see brackets being used in literature much. There's also a point at the end of Chapter five where I couldn't tell if the "Huh?" was the character's thought or some AI going online.
I also felt that Chapter 1 should have been an outright prologue. The constant shifts between cities and countries I also found distracting, since the main perspective was a beggar and spent some time with him before abandoning it entirely to speak about the end of the world as we knew it - and immediately skipped what I thought to be thousands of years. Unless the years were using a different metric from the new golds, it honestly felt like it wasted my time.
As far as character and story, well. It lost me at Chapter 6 when this turned out to be an RPG when a "skill" was acquired. Then in Chapter 7 I get an entire stat screen. It's just not my thing, I'm afraid.
I liked the idea of an apocalypse turning out to be a sort of invasion by godlike beings, and recreating the world as they saw fit. I just think the timeline should have been more clear and condensed. For that, I give the story a 4.5 because it's a fine idea by itself, but it gets 3's everywhere else.. not as a technical issue but as a personal preference.
It just had some technical issues. The grammar is mostly fine except when it skips out on common technique to fill the author's personal style, but it wasn't