It's a huge world with magic, chivalry, adventure, war, and insurmountable transparent barriers.It is a world of sword and magic, love and betrayal, soul and steel.

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SquirrelkRoyal Road

★ 1.0

Alright so this fiction has 2 critical issues. And by critical I mean utterly critical.
Firstly, the grammar is all over the place. I have no idea what is happening most of the time because the sentence structure changes every few sentences and there are words that have obviously been autocorrected to something else making certain things impossible to understand.
Secondly the pacing is god awful. you are thrown into this fiction with no ryhme or reason as to what is going on, which would normally be alright if the author took the time to give us a bit of internal monologue as to what the characters or atleast the protagonist is thinking. but the author doesn't. It's just one fever dream event to the next to the next to the next. You will have no idea why anything matters and that seems intentional, which is really bad writing.
Now for the smaller issues.
The events, despite being 95% of the story, are badly narrated. Descriptions are light and instead of us being told about the enviroment and the the occurances we are rather told what happened like this was some first person chronicle from a history book.
Also I want to point out that the description to this fiction tells you utterly nothing about and perhaps that is a good thing, because there is nothing here.

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Community Reviews(1)