Alpha

Information

Status

Hiatus

Year

2016

Author

dragonboy

• PROLOGUE
  Apr 19, 2021
• birthed from nothing
  Feb 12, 2021
• A Cold Welcome
  Jul 6, 2016
• Of Foreign Suns
  Jun 23, 2016
• Chapter 4 New Home
  Oct 13, 2016
• chapter 3 race
  Mar 13, 2016
• chapter 2 a new day
  Mar 12, 2016
• chapter 1 blue box
  Mar 12, 2016
• prologue plague
  Mar 12, 2016

Reviews

Community Reviews(2)

• yourwordsmysoulRoyal Road

  ★★★★★ 5.0

  Wow werewolf Harry did NOT expect that! Super excited for this! He was already pretty broken but can't wait to see how this develops. How will he control it, will it take over?? Will he kill as a wolf and if so how will he deal with it when he isn't?
• Probably_an_authorRoyal Road

  ★★★ 3.0

  (I can't find a button that will tag this review as including some spoilers, so beware of spoilers!)
  I've been looking for a werewolf story with a unique twist for some time now. This might be it, but there's a lot of work that needs to be done. So, to begin with the critique.
  The story begins with an action scene and it's immediate the author doesn't have much experience writing action scenes because it lacks excitement. It does, however, create some intrigue, so I'll give it that. One tip I'd like to offer is to do some research into the concept of 'showing' rather than 'telling'.
  Staying on the subject of 'telling', the majority of the first chapter is info-dump after info-dump. In fact, we are told the backstory of almost every major character introduced. Not much really happens in chapter 1, besides all the world-building, which I feel was a missed opportunity. Some sort of prologue in which we see one of their backstories first hand might have been a better choice. Another option could have been extending the action sequence (which only spans a paragraph or two) into something much more tense, that takes up the majority of the chapter, would certainly have hooked me in more effectively.
  Onto the topic of grammar. This is where I think the author struggled the most. Paragraph structure in general needs a lot of work: some paragraphs are far too long and contain several different topics, and dialogue isn't separated at all which further adds to paragraph length. On occasion, the narrator switches between third-person limited to third-person omniscient, which can be quite confusing. In one instance, present tense was used instead of past tense, pulling me out of the story for a short moment. All-in-all, I get the impression that the author hasn't been writing very long, so hasn't had the time to perfect their grammar.
  However, I do give a higher score to the characters. It's easy to see that the author is passionate about their story and has fun writing it. And t