Whisper of the Star
Self-Published
Community Rating
Description
Long ago, humans started to get mystical abilities, ranging from the very powerful to the very odd. The amound of people with these powers grew, until about half of the population had it. They were called Spirits. Treated as freaks and robbed of their home, the Spirits were forced to seek refuge elsewhere. No one saw them again.
Until recently. Cloud, a 14 year old Spirit boy, crashes through a roof of a rural house and lays unconscious on the living room floor, much to the 15 year old girl, Ferah's, dismay.
Information
- Status
- Hiatus
- Year
- 2022
- Author
- TheBulldozer
Royal Road Stats
- Rating
- 4.0/ 5.0
- Followers
- 3
- Views
- 469
Chapters(2 total)
Reviews
No reviews yet. Be the first to share your thoughts!
Community Reviews(2)
- FRENCHIERoyal Road★★★★★ 5.0This story has a really strong plot that you'll love to see unfold. It has amazing characters that the author makes you fall in love with, it's witty and humorous but also emotional and action packed! The authors technique is good, and I love the writing style. For a beginner writer, the story is exceptional, even if there are a few parts that could be improved.
- EsclaRoyal Road★★★ 3.0The basic hook is solid, and the premise is very interesting. I'm excited to learn more about the Light, such as what it is, what it did, where it came from, and so on and so forth. There are just so many questions raised by the prologue alone!
The characters are varied in their interests, what little I've seen of them at this point (two chapters in, counting the prologue). They feel a little bit lackluster, though, like they all speak with the same voice. I understand that changing that is very difficult, and that it is entirely possible to write a really good story without varied character tones, but without that depth, they are only average.
The use of first person limited and third person omnicient is interesting, and makes the style pop. It's an unusual choice (first person, that is, third person is everywhere. Everywhere.) and I'm happy to see it here.
The grammar, frankly, needs work; commas where there should be semicolons, awkward phrasing, and other beginner mistakes are scattered throughout the prose. This makes reading more of a chore and less of a pleasure, at least for me.
I'm interested to see where this goes, and I'm looking forward to watching the author grow as a writer as time goes by.