The Shattered Empire

Self-Published

Community Rating

Description

Book 1:CompleteBook 2:Ongoing

WhereDunemeetsRed RisingandShadow Slavein a city of dying dimensions.

I survived my birth in the Balah. I survived the baptism meant to be my execution. Now House Azure wants to weaponize what I have become, and House Vermilion wants me dead.

In the Mere's killing trials, my reflection walks beside me. Time fractures under my touch. But the power awakening within me is not a gift. It is a hunger that demands to be fed.

They call me contaminated.

Balah-touched.

Eater.

In a city built on Hells, the question is not whether I am a monster.

It is whether I can control the monster I am becoming.

What to Expect from The Shattered Empire

Expect complex world-building, an intricate and original magic system, and a story that rewards patience — a slow-burn beginning that grows into something vast, strange, and unforgettable. Every thread connects; every secret matters.

Release Schedule:5 chapters/week

Information

Status: Ongoing
Year: 2025
Author: The Blackwell

Royal Road Stats

Rating: 3.9/ 5.0
Followers: 223
Views: 21,186

Reviews

No reviews yet. Be the first to share your thoughts!

Community Reviews(8)

RhinoUPRoyal Road
★★★★★ 5.0
This prose doesn’t ask. It tells. It delivers what it promises: a high-stakes, sensory onslaught that feels less like reading and more like surviving. The emotional core, when it arrives, is simple, clean, and sharp. The story is really engaging and I really have enjoyed the first 10 chapters and will continue reading. Bravo!
Ethan Y CottonRoyal Road
★★★★★ 4.5
Normally I give an overview before breaking my rating down. I can’t really do that this time because of how intense this story is, so you have to settle for this TLDR
tldr: buckle in for an intense story right off the bat. It is far more than I was ready for, you aren’t ready either, but you should still check it out and enjoy the roller coaster!
now the ratings, in reverse order because of reasons.
characters: backstabbing, self serving, scheming, and political machinations are the name of the game. Our main character is surrounded by enemies and unreliable ‘allies’ it’s almost enough to make you think he is cursed. I love the interplay already, so much is going on with the promise of much more.
grammar: I didn’t have any problems with the grammar, it may be a bit mmm dense at times, but no errors I noticed.
story: there is a lot going on and it is still early days. I really look forward to seeing what is in store.
style: I saved this category for last because it is the only mark I have against this work. My issue with the style is how complex everything becomes immediately. What I mean is, while we are still learning the characters names and the world we live in, we are doing multiple flashbacks, pov switches, a perspective flip (1st person to 2nd person and back), and visions. It is just a bit much, right at the start as well. That won’t be a huge problem for those who stick around, but I can foresee some people being put off to the point of not giving the story a proper shot.
all in all, this is a very intense story with lots of moving parts. It is definitely worth a read and once you do you too can join me, neck deep in the intrigue.
good stuff!
Ian_Scott_WritingRoyal Road
★★★★★ 4.5
There is no shortage of evocative images in The Shattered Empire. Multiple times in the opening chapters, I caught myself in awe of the descriptions and colors. This effect did not wane as the later chapters passed. Encased within truly masterful writing is an extremely complex and layered world (and worlds within worlds, in fact), with sci-fi elements woven in so intricately and delicately that the world never loses its authenticity or mystery.
The writing wasn't just incredibly stimulating to read, but there were also some parts where I felt inspiration for my own. That feels like a good place to start the advanced review.
Style Score: The writing style is terrific. In particular, the prose pacing and rhythm routinely show up as strengths, as the writer knows exactly how to weave shorter and longer sentences together. The style not only lifts the story's foundation, but also paints the futuristic world in an ethereal glimmer -- one that is both accessible but also untouchable in a way that fuels the reader's curiosity.
Grammar Score: I'd give a 6 for this if I could. The grammar, as one other reviewer said, truly is impeccable. The only negative side effect, from my perspective, is that some sections are so reliant on the flowing prose that the descriptions occasionally get repetitive. However, this was few and far between. The writer's vocabulary is extremely expansive -- a tool made all the more potent with the grammar within.
Story Score: The lineage that defines Janus' struggle, the hierarchical system that molds him and his peers, and the fantastic, extraordinary metaphysical aspects of the world within piqued my curiosity. The very latter, in particular, had me totally enthralled at certain points. The realms splitting. The Eidolons with their four-pupiled eyes. The tormenting currents of the Nenuphar. All of it had me scraping the text for more lore.
The story, from a substance progression and character standpoint, is at times a bit too slow and idle from m
AsmodemusRoyal Road
★★★★★ 4.5
General thoughts
From the first chapter it is immediately apparent how much thought and effort has gone into the author's writing style. The words he chooses paint a vivid, almost dream-like picture of the world and the characters he's thought up. It's not often you see such excellent word choice and prose from an author on this website.
Style
For me, personally, I absolutely love the writing style. It's writing I wish I could emulate but often fall short of. I do think it could be a bit too much for some, but as this is my review to type I will be giving my personal opinion, which is 5 stars, easily. Amazing work, baron.
Story
I found the story to be quite intriguing, but a tad slow to take off which might be off-putting for some. As beautiful as the writing itself is, I could see someone dropping it because they aren't hooked immediately. For me, though, I love a slow build up, which is why I gave it four stars.
Grammar
Impeccable. I haven't found any faults, but that might be because I'm not a native English speaker, so I could have missed a few minor mistakes. I'm confident enough in my understanding of English, though, to say that the grammar overall is great. No complaints here.
Characters
The characters are mysterious, as I said; almost dreamlike in a way. Most give off an ethereal feeling, but after reading a few chapters some of their personalities and motivations start to shine through. Janus, the main character, is painted well as a young man with insecurities about his heritage and place in his family. I was mostly intrigued by the relationship he had with his sister, and I'm eager to see how they both develop.
Final thoughts
An amazingly well crafted story, with beautiful use of metaphors and ethereal writing. I'm amazed by the talent displayed by the author and I can't wait to read on to see where the story goes.
A word of warning for the people who like simple, straightforward writing though; this might not be for you, but I urge you to give it a chan
Jonathan BRoyal Road
★★★★ 4.0
I thought your story was good, but I have a few notes below that I believe could help make it even better. Let me know if you have any follow-up questions.
Kind of creepy how eloquent Janus is at six years old. This could of course be intentional on your end, just an observation.
There are a lot of proper nouns in your story. It's a bit confusing trying to decipher what they all mean. It's cool throwing us into a world the main character is already deeply familiar with, but as a result, I was sometimes left feeling I didn't have a perfect grasp of what was happening in your scenes.
I wonder if this pure bloodlines has led to any sorts of in-breeding issues. That could be interesting, the idea of being pure, but weaker than a commoner because of how you've bred.
It might be useful to spend more time establishing the status quo before Janus places his hand on the veilstone and this huge shift happens in his life. It's really cool what you're describing, but since I don't know much of what his life was like before this event, it's hard to feel as shocked by the impact of the change. It feels like if Lord of the Rings started with Frodo immediately leaving The Shire. The story wouldn't hit as hard, because we wouldn't know anything about the world he was leaving behind.
In chapter 4, Janus' grandmother says that he's different, but we haven't seen the status quo for how everyone else in this kingdom is supposed to be acting. I'm fine believing he's different, but at this point, I haven't been shown what normal is.
I like Janus' relationship with his sister. It's very sweet and nice to know that he has an ally no matter what happens in the story.
My two main critiques of your story are the language and the lack of an established status quo. You clearly have a very strong grasp of the English language, but everything is so flowery, that it ends up distracting from the story, especially since Janus is just a child. Also, there are big things happening in your world, but I
Nathan NolanRoyal Road
★★★★ 4.0
The Shattered Empire introduces us to Janus, and we are immediately thrown into the chaos that is his existence. Baron, the author, does well with their descriptive staccato prose to put us in the mindset of Janus. There is a deep world behind the stories, with lots of different characters and Houses. I’ve read through Interlude 3 - and there is a good foundation for an epic story ahead.
Style: As mentioned, the author writes in staccato prose. Sentences are short, but the descriptions, metaphors, and similes are beautiful. Each sentence hits hard, and you can almost smell the environment with their descriptions. The latter parts are a strong suit of the story, but I do feel they are too frequent of an occurrence. (I will describe it later in the story section).
Grammar: Word choice, spelling, grammar: all solid. The author finds the perfect words to describe each scene.
Story: Something that I want to give a higher score and something that I believe with more chapters will deserve one much higher. (which, starting in chapter 9, really starts to come into its own). That being said, as of Interlude 3, the story feels too sporadic for me. The first few chapters make a lot of sense since we are experiencing the world through Janus. I find the abundance of proper nouns to be fairly overwhelming. I would like to see a bit more background into more of the characters. It feels like we are too rapidly thrown into a world that is constantly shifting times and viewpoints. Again, I think there is a very good likelihood that more will make sense in the coming chapters. As mentioned in the style section, most sentences are filled with epic prose. In medium doses, I think this works great. Unfortunately, almost every other sentence seems epic, and there isn't much time to really take a breather and just experience the world.
Character: Janus is a unique character who has many internal battles going on at once. Janus feels like a fleshed-out character, but because of the pacing o
ScorpionMageRoyal Road
★★★★ 3.5
This isn't Shattered Empire, this is "Shattered Story".
Every chapter might was well be it's own short story because everything is skipped and then boom you are in a new chapter about something else, with no clue as to what happened or what the outcome was of the previous chapter. Is this new chapter a memory of the past or did we jump into the future a few days, no one knows. This whole story is a mystery. What happens between the chapters are a mystery. What happened to the MC at the end of the chapter is a mystery. Are we back in time or forward in time, is a mystery. What happened to this person or that person is a mystery. Everything is a mystery.
Unfortunately it seems EVERYTHING is skipping over, so the Reader has no clue what is going on. Thus far the reader has read 10 chapters and has no clue what is going on because all the information that should be used to explain the story has been skipped or not written. It is as if you are listening in on someone on a phone call and all you are getting is half the conversation...
I'm sorry, but no one knows what is going on because no one knows where these "cousins" got these abilities/powers from. That they use to attack the MC with. What are they? Are they magic? Are they abilities? Are they abilities that come from their bloodlines? And why does the MC have none of them?
So far this story reads like someone trying to remember a foggy dream they had years ago. It is confusing because of this. It seems like it could be a fun or at least an interesting story, but there is to much unsaid and unexplained right now.
MulBe039Royal Road
★ 1.0
It's a LitRPG.
I got dumped INTO the story by falsely clicking on an ad.
I personally don't think the writing is very strong.
First person present tense will do that
I would not have chosen to read this, but I rate what I read.
Perhaos the story has potentisl, but it has to be up your alley.
It isn't up mine.
Please switch the ad to bring you to the cover page of the fiction, not directly into chapter 1