The Place Where Skeletons Dance

Self-Published

Community Rating

Description

When Henry Becker, a down on his luck security guard, finds himself in a realm of empty streets being hunted by monstrous horrors born from campfire stories, he must learn to overcome his worst nightmares and try to find happiness in the Hell they call Paradise. Will he be able to unravel the the sinister mysteries of Paradise or will he be trapped forever in its empty towns and wood.

This story is a new twist on the Slasher genre. It features a variety of frightening monsters which I tried to make different from what I've seen before. I took inspiration from stories like Cabin in the Woods, HP Lovecraft, and Alan Wake.

Updated two to three times a month for a little bit! I got busy lol. Sometimes more often if I build up a back catalog lol.

Information

Status: Hiatus
Year: 2023
Author: Bjorn56

Royal Road Stats

Rating: 4.6/ 5.0
Followers: 27
Views: 15,310

Chapters(34 total)

What readers say about The Place Where Skeletons Dance

“Preety good story, if I had to say it, the worldbuilding is probably the best part and it shows how careful the author has been in revealing from them, but what he did show intrigued me to want to find out more. The characters are...fine, they need to still…”
DimensionalWriter27Royal Road5.0 / 5
“I am enjoying this story, and am looking forward to more. The worldbuilding and mood is excellent. The author is brewing up something creepy, and I'm gonna be here for it. Grammar is good. Characters are still being developed, which is fine. I'm intereste…”
Doctor ZeroRoyal Road5.0 / 5

Reviews

No reviews yet. Be the first to share your thoughts!

Community Reviews(10)

DimensionalWriter27Royal Road
★★★★★ 5.0
Preety good story, if I had to say it, the worldbuilding is probably the best part and it shows how careful the author has been in revealing from them, but what he did show intrigued me to want to find out more. The characters are...fine, they need to still find their footing to stand out, but I prefer to see it as an chance for the writer to develop them, grammar is fine, and English is not my main language, so I am not gonna judge too harshly on it. Overall, pretty solid story with potential.
Doctor ZeroRoyal Road
★★★★★ 5.0
I am enjoying this story, and am looking forward to more.
The worldbuilding and mood is excellent. The author is brewing up something creepy, and I'm gonna be here for it.
Grammar is good.
Characters are still being developed, which is fine. I'm interested to learn more about them, and that's what you want at 50 pages.
Thanks!
Rhea ZuluRoyal Road
★★★★★ 5.0
Style: The author has a creative way of introducing certain elements. Sometimes, especially with character backstories, it feels as if you’re reading a case file or a newspaper article, which I think is unique and a fun way to tell a story. The other parts of the story are written in a way that invokes a mood of creepiness that is fitting for the genre.
Story: The story follows Henry after his death as he goes to paradise, a land haunted by ghost stories and other missing persons who were thrust into this world by a red-eyed man. The concept is interesting, and there are a lot of mysteries to the story, especially in the beginning as Henry tries to navigate his new reality with his new companions. It seems to be headed in a good direction.
Grammar: The grammar was good, and it helped with ease of reading and made the story much more palatable.
Characters: The characters felt fleshed out, and those who didn’t certainly felt like there was more to them that had yet to be revealed. I especially like that everyone has their own ghost story that is a reflection of their fears and tells the reader a lot about them. Henry seems lost, like he still needs as much direction in this new world as he did in his old one. I do feel like he was a bit too hard on Mark, he’s only been there a few days, and Mark has spent decades in this place, so I’m sure that not only has he seen some shit, but he has a good reason for keeping quiet about things. I might be wrong though. I think the characters have a lot of potential beyond just their fears.
My main issue is that the story feels a bit lacking in the fear aspect, but I do appreciate the aesthetic that the detailed settings and the backstory of the ghost stories provide. The only one that I found even remotely scary was the skeleton man, so props to the author on that. Otherwise, this was a good read with lots of potential.
VVVVVVRoyal Road
★★★★★ 5.0
The story has us follow Henry as he one night is transported to the dark world of Paradise. Each section of Paradise is built to represent something about the small group of characters that are trapped in this world with unique monsters and a time-loop mechanism.
The nature of the time loop and the subsequent normalization means the horror aspect is quickly only wall paint, or that's what I thought for a chapter before the author played with this established expectation. When something has been the same for so long any abnormalities stand out and cause that creeping unsettling feeling in even the veteran time-loopers of the group. I have not read all the chapters that are out but I have faith in the author's ability to deliver.
The cast is small, but each person in the group feels fleshed out with their own backstory, which we get to see hints of in flashbacks and dialogue, though it took me a few chapters to wrap my head around all the names, especially when more than two people are talking. Perhaps more unique speech patterns or descriptors between dialogue would have helped. They are quick to playfully banter and share sensitive information. Perhaps is me who just wants more obvious tension?
The strong point of the story is the immersive environment descriptions, the world, and the concepts. Paradise can be beautiful and horrid. Characters can turn with the mood of the scene. The contrasts I think add to the unique atmosphere of the work. Each chapter is distributed in a way that it grips the reader and is easy to binge.
There are mentions in other reviews of grammatical errors but I did not notice such things. I can only assume it’s due to the efforts of the authour who continues to actively work on the piece.
VioletMoonRoyal Road
★★★★★ 4.5
Okay, this is a good read. At first, it felt slightly stale, because the main character doesn't really stand out. However, I found the story and supporting cast to be more than enough to carry the story through, at least for the first part of it. I'm hoping more main character development happens later.
In terms of style, this was easy to read and follow. The descriptions were vivid and the author does a good job of conveying the scenery. I thought this was a strong suit for the story.
Grammar took a slight hit, but it was mostly because there were numerous occasions of mixed up tenses. The author mostly writes in past tense, but then sometimes through in misplaced present tense wording, which threw me off and distracted from the content. This is a really easy fix and I didn't penalize the story heavily by any means. A thorough second or third edit should catch everything.
Story: This is where it shines. I found the concept to be fascinating and creepy. I found the scenario to be believable and interesting. I'm excited to see what happens and what the overall rules are regarding Paradise.
I only docked this because I felt like the MC was a bit mundane. This isn't a SI as far as I can tell, so the character can stand to have more distinct characteristics. The way it reads currently is very much that this could be a self-insert, so that anyone could put themselves in the situation. If this is the case, then I would move my ranking up to 5/5, but I didn't see it noted anywhere, in which case the author can add a lot more personality to Henry.
In any case, this is well done and I think the author has a really nice story on his hands!
SmirkyWRoyal Road
★★★★★ 4.5
Style - There's a few jarring switches in narration here, that often may make the reader need to stop and look the sentence or paragraph over again. It often goes from third person limited to third person omniscient, which can sometimes be confusing. That said, I don't personally think switching things up is bad. I just think the execution here could use a little work, to make such transitions a bit smoother.
Story - The strongest part of this, and something I genuinely liked a lot. Uniqueness is a great strength here, and I really can't think of many stories that I would say are similar. A lot of the aspects of this story are backrooms-esque, but mainly in feeling, rather than being directly similar. I don't have any criticisms here.
Grammar - Of everything, I felt that grammar suffered the most. There unfortunately are enough mistakes to make reading this a bit difficult or confusing at times. Not so much that it was hard to read, though. English is a very confusing language with plenty of grammar rules thrown to the wind. I think most authors on this platform end up making obscure grammar mistakes that most readers wouldn't notice. That said, I feel a lot of the mistakes here could be fixed with a little bit of editing at the end of writing. I'd recommend reading the chapter with a critical eye after you finish it. Look for mistakes, and you'll find them (especially if you're reading it over 1 or more days after actually typing it up.)
Characters - I felt that they were a bit two-dimensional. Not every story needs to be character-driven, so I don't think that's a huge problem. I just feel that Henry especially could use a bit more depth to his character. Aside from that though, I don't have many problems with characters. I liked the way their dialogue was written most of the time, which is mainly what I look for when deciding about characters.
Overall - Despite the mistakes present, I feel that they don't take away enough from the story to deserve a poor rating.
The Reality Next DoorRoyal Road
★★★★★ 4.5
Style, if possible, I would rate it with a 4.9, here is why :
The writing style is commendable, exhibiting a high level of creativity and engaging prose. The author's ability to craft vivid descriptions and maintain a consistent tone contributes to the immersive nature of the narrative.
Grammar with a 4.7 or 4.8 :
The overall grammar is strong, with minimal errors or issues. The narrative flows smoothly, and the author demonstrates a solid command of language. The slight deduction towards 4,5 stars, acknowledges that perfection in grammar can be elusive, and there may be occasional room for improvement, albeit on a minor scale.
Story would be a 4.6, here is why :
The story is intriguing, introducing a unique and well developed world with the concept of different zones within Paradise. The plot's progression is compelling, with mysteries and challenges keeping the reader hooked. The 4.5 stars is because of expectations in narrative pacing.
Characters would be a 4.7 if possible, here is why :
The characters are well crafted, each exhibiting distinct personalities and contributing to the overall dynamics of the story. The deduction is minimal and might reflect the potential for even deeper exploration of character backgrounds or motivations in future chapters, although the current characterization is strong and engaging. I might make it five stars after continuing the story.
The story consistently maintains a high level of quality across all aspects. The writing style is engaging, the grammar is strong, and the storytelling is compelling. The characters are well-developed, and the mysteries within the plot keep the reader intrigued. The gradual introduction of the rules of Paradise and the unique challenges faced by its inhabitants contribute to a captivating narrative. The incorporation of details, such as the exploration of different zones and the imposing wall, adds depth to the world building. Overall, the story demonstrates a commendable blend of creativity, suspe
FatherGrampRoyal Road
★★★★★ 4.5
There's a lot to the story going on, but its sets in presentation of colors that tries to absorb every background of information as possible. It's quite a demanding feat actually, and some would less likely appreciate it. I've seen authors here in royalroad being thrown with hurls of sarcasm in attempts to score their requiem of envy, or maybe, their preference/bias hinders them to see the style subjectively.
Style: It's objectively written with prose, it's one of the many traits that I often habitually used, so much that, I criticize it most of the time. But I don't find it wrong, it's simple and detailed. "It offers perception but at the price of emotions." (It's a quote that I made up at the back of my mind ever since I started writing)
This type of style suffers from dialogue. But don't put too much thought to it. Every written story is written to a style that fits the theme.
Story: The setting seems to be inspired with a lot of detective trope in hindsight. That's a really good bonus for horror stories if anyone wonders. There's depth to it, for an example. It conveys the thought well enough that it's able to confine a space large enough to describe an action. In such stories, it excels especially when you try write a story about horror and the use of perception. The past tense is well used, evenly splice enough to capture each pacing of the story.
But again, addressing the written style used by the author, the tension seems lack-luster especially when it's a horror story. You need a character pattern at this point. Appeal with the character and merged it with the style of the background.
I'd say its claustrophobically written. (That's a compliment)
Grammar. There are some punctuation errors, but its minimal, it can be easily ignored.
ProseBardRoyal Road
★★★★ 4.0
Style= I was really captivated by the way the author portrayed the turmoil and confusion of the characters, through the atmosphere. The narrative drew me in. I couldn't stop reading because the descriptions of the buildings and surroundings were so vivid that it was easy to imagine them.
Characters=The characters in the story felt real. Each one of them had their own distinct personalities and interactions making it easy to connect with their emotions and intentions. It was thanks to this depth and intrigue added in the characters personalities and dynamics that the story remained engaging throughout
Grammar= I didn't notice any issues with grammar in the story.
Story= Its always challenging to review the story without giving away any spoilers. But the one thing I can confidently say is that the story does an excellent job of creating a sense of dread and mystery, especially in the beginning, leaving readers eager to uncover the secrets of this strange and unsettling world the main character finds himself in by combining the elements of mystery and horror.
Overall, this was a great read. The story itself has a lot of potential and I am really looking forward to how it goes in the future
L.K. WinturRoyal Road
★★★★ 4.0
The place where skeletons dance is a new, unique take on common horror trope, blending a well constructed world with realistic characters that makes for an easy, interesting read.
The main character is just a normal guy, which I find refreshing in a genre where magic and mythology is prevalent to being the star. His background is well contextualized, and makes you feel for the character in a relatable way, rather than pity him.
The other characters are likeable, and are introduced in a way that makes each of them unique, yet realistic. Having just finished chapter 11, I'm really interested in reading more, in particular the development of Henry and his world. Wendy is my favorite character so far, and I'd love to read more about her motivation.
Notes on ratings:
Style 4 - some mechanism issues i.e the narrative style which I have discussed
Grammar 4 - some minor issues i.e capitalization which I have discussed
Story 5 - Overall a unique horror fantasy using a delivery I've not quite read before, curious to see how the world develops and a great use of cliffhangers to keep the reader interested
Character 4 - characters are well rounded and a lot of backstory given, they're easy to understand but would like to see more emotional development
Spoilers:
Pros:
The first few chapters of the story are a great introduction, a lot of background is given in a short space without being overwhelming. It gives you an easy overview of Henry. Suspense is built really well towards the end of the chapter, evoking fear in the reader.
The world building is done really well throughout, and explains where Henry is in the space around him. The fantasy world is really unique, and I absolutely love the way it's created. It's not immediately obvious and the way it's explained through dialogue is great.
The horror throughout is written is incredible, the gore is tasteful yet scary, and you're really able to put yourself into Henrys shoes, and feel his fear. I'd actually like to see more horro