The Mortal Seven Sins

Self-Published

Community Rating

Description

In the early days of earth, a time long past, humanity faced a terrible calamity that brought it crumbling to its knees. From the ashes of humanity, the supernatural took its place on the throne as kings of the jungle, leaving humanity to whittle away underneath. With humanity so lost in time, what would it be like to be a human in such a trying time?Here enters the tale of Alexander P. Rosemary, a young man at the ripe age of twenty three. A rare genetic mutation changed his DNA into that of a human amongst the Rosemary lineage, the strongest vampire clan in the world. He went to school like any other, and passed his days the way he thought normal; that is, until his humanity was revealed. At the age of ten, he was sent off to his aunt's in the countryside, and returned to his hometown after graduating college. Now working for the Bureau of Racial Equality through happenstance, Alex is tested day in and day out on what humanity truly means.Watch his story unfold in a city where the dead rule, angels are ill-omens, and where his humanity is truly tested; In this eternal city called Ageless.

Information

Status: Hiatus
Year: 2016
Author: Pair-a-dimes

Royal Road Stats

Rating: 3.8/ 5.0
Followers: 63
Views: 29,025

Chapters(19 total)

Reviews

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Community Reviews(1)

MattajRoyal Road
★★ 2.0
The story starts alright but then there is a slope down. I understand that having mysteries in a story can make it good but too much can destroy it. Unless you plan to reveal some basic information soon, it will be hard to continue. You can keep what you plan for the future as mystery but you should at least give a proper prologue because you want us to feel e.g. anger or some other emotions regarding MC and world around him but there is no enough information about what happened for the first 20 or so years of his life. You keep referencing to his past while keeping it below minimum requirement to make people immersed in it.
***Spoiler alert***
Good example of what I mentioned in the last two sentences is where you keep telling us about what happen when he was ten but you skip any details (something happen and now he is not liked by his family). The prologue can be completely removed (because that kind of prologue is only good when you have everything until that chapter ready, otherwise it simply is annoying) and replaced by one chapter of his life before we meet him in main part of the story. It can be written in 3rd person POV but at least one chapter would be good about main events that happened in his life.
About POVs, you should at least give notification whose point of view it is because sometimes I was lost.
I would give you 3 starts with more background information about MC or prologue about him. 3.5 for describing whose POV is currently in a story.
To have 4 or more starts, it is too early in the story to say if this novel will deserve it in the future.
(My rating is that 3 stars means an average story with nothing that makes it special. Receiving less mean that it stands out in negative way and more than 3 it stands out in positive way).