The Legend Of Rave [ Hiatus ]
Self-Published
Community Rating
Description
, a well known gamer of his time was betrayed by his friends and leaved the game. Only to return later on and take revenge against them, but it was not for long as he wasn't able to opose the powerful forces upon him and retired. It have been years since then and it was around the time a new and upcoming virtual reality game was going to be released once a certain chapter have been reached, i will post a poll which you will decide whether to go pursue the """" harem """" route or the only 1 girl route. And that chapter is still far2 away
Information
- Status
- Hiatus
- Author
- Dusk
Tags
Royal Road Stats
- Rating
- 4.1/ 5.0
- Followers
- 120
Chapters(0 total)
No chapters available yet.
Reviews
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Community Reviews(1)
- TheNameOfTheWindRoyal Road★★★★ 4.0this is gonna be a long review...
Lets start with the Style score first. I simply love it. every time you make a little mistake in the dialogue or in explaining something, people point it out, and tell you your writing style need some kind of change. And you take that feedback, and use it, like a boss.
There may have been some mistakes earlier, but they are either gone, or it's simply me there can't find them.
There is of course some mistakes in the explanation, but that's because of the grammar. So let's start looking at that instead.
The grammer is good enough for me. I have almost no problem reading anything you have written. But there are small mistakes here and there. Sometimes you repeat your sentences, which is a little weird, but it doesn't make the story unreadable, or hard to understand.
I really like the story. I like how the MC is built, I like how the world is explained, I like how the quests is unfolding. But there is some other things that I don't like, which I think need some improvement in the future.
The background-story is a little lacking. It is not lacking in content, which is the most important faktor, it more like "how it is being told". Here is an example of how an good background-story unfolds: In the X-men movies, you are never told specifically the whole story, of how or why the MC is as he is, we, the readers/watchers, can only try to guess what has happened through small flashbacks or remarks.
You kind of skip all of it like it doesn't even matter in "Chapter 0.5 : Short Prologue, Birth Of Rave"
This "Chapter 0 : Prologue, Vasyl Raul ( v2 )" is a masterpiece (with an exception of the first 11 lines. They are unnecessary and spoiling)
After reading "Chapter 0 : Prologue, Vasyl Raul ( v2 )" I thought this story was gonna be about revenge. But "Chapter 0.5 : Short Prologue, Birth Of Rave" destroyed that completely.
All that potential the story could have had, is now gone... You could just had written, that he got his revenge over time, and