The Last Primordials

Information

Status

Ongoing

Author

Trish

Reviews

Community Reviews(4)

• DokkaNRoyal Road

  ★★★★★ 5.0

  and it may be too early to give accurate feedback, but I'll try:
  Style
  At this point not very original, but what setting can be... too much was covered. Too much. But the execution? Flawless. Really well written, basically everything that happen have a reason behind it and/or future consequence. The plot development is linear and very consistent. Pacing is very stable, no crazy time skips.
  Although there is liberal use of narrative exposition by the author, there were few info dumps that went on and on for hundreds of words. Everything in this world feels alive. So many stories that I enjoy suffer from the lack of immersion created by simply not making sense. This story makes sense.
  Of the shortcomings: there is little to none purposeful mystery. The authors writing style leaves little to imagination, making the story less engaging. I myself like to figure out what actually happened, convoluted plots/plans within plans bringing your emotional investment taking you on a rollercoaster throughout it all.
  Story
  As for the story score, the execution of the plot points were intriguing. This is an action series and we are on the verge of war (in the training camp arc at the time of writing this review) but we are only at the very beginning, so everything is still ahead.
  Grammar
  I am not a native English-speaker, so I cannot comment on the exact grammar, but 99% of the book is flawless as far as I can tell. I can’t judge someone with grammar better than mine anyway!
  Character
  The MC is enthusiastic, pure hearted, a bit naive and benevolent, at least from my perspective. The support characters draw you in, and at first they are what carries the story, but slowly without a doubt, Lolo becomes a central figure among her peers. All the characters are capable of acting in a rational and realistic manner.
  As for character development it's too early to say something.
  Overall а solid story with an overarching plot. Easily readable in one go.
• BullerRoyal Road

  ★★★★★ 4.5

  My favourtie characther would currently be the great owl. Seems like an nice enough person, with just enough backstory that my minds keeps defaulting to them. Wouldnt say that they seem polite, since most of the things said about them are close-to-bullying, which is fair I suppose. She does seem to be that kind of person.
  What else to say? Grammar is nice enough, but the style is a little clanky for my taste. Couldnt get a good flow going, if you catch my drift. The conversations just felt halted at some points, as if the people were supposed to say more. Or maybe just less at other points. I understand that we needed to know more about the world, but just laying out a whole fact sheet during the exam felt kinda off-putting. Others might like that but i didn't.
  4.5/5. Good enough
• J P KoenigRoyal Road

  ★★★★★ 4.5

  This is a well-written fantasy story about Lolo, a princess and child prodigy coming of age while going through cultural exchanges with neighboring tribes.  Lolo is a kind, bubbly and outgoing person whose natural charisma helps her bridge culture gaps with others of her own generation - all of whom will eventually be rulers or powerful influences in their own right some day.
  The Good
  The story is well-paced, well plotted, and well written.  There are little to no grammar issues, and the author does a great job with dialogue and descriptions.  This is easily in the top-tier of RR quality writing.  The style is engaging, and the characters unique and interesting in their own right.  It feels like all the most important characters are well fleshed out and three dimensional.
  The Bad
  There is very little bad in this story, so this is just some minor comments that (I hope) will help the author when it comes time for revisions.  First of all, Lolo has six brothers, and they honestly all run together after awhile into "generic brother" template after awhile.  Not sure if this is fixable, or if it needs fixing?  Secondly, the annual exchange - how is it the crown princes/princesses of big tribes have no bodyguards?  This struck me as odd from the beginning, and definitely comes into sharp relief during some of the darker parts of the story.  Finally, the last is in the Wolf Arc.  The author spends more time describing "advanced partner fighting" techniques than on the final tournament of the summer.  The tournament felt rushed and truncated, although I did appreciate it not being a dozen chapters of fight scenes.
  The Ugly
  This story has very dark themes.  The "traumatizing content" tag is not for show.  Lolo's light-hearted, kind personality helps balance this out, but the content is still there.  The story deals with depression, abuse, torture and sexual assault, and that's just in the parts I've read so far.  Fortunately, the MC's strong personality perseveres, so the dar
• VnatorRoyal Road

  ★★★★★ 4.5

  Where to begin? The story is about a girl named Huo Lohse, a member of a particular tribe in a world made up of many tribes based around different real-world cultures, each tied to a specific species of animal spirit.
  Huo (Lolo) is a treat to read about, with her high-energy, friendly charisma, and overall innocent attitude. She might be a child prodigy when it comes to combat, but it's never played up as "oh, look at how great she is!" Instead, she's written as a wonderful, bubbly, and relatable person who you just can't help want to be friends with in real life.
  The other characters are also a treat, each with their own backgrounds and attitudes. The only issue is that early on, a large number of them get introduced all at once, so it's hard to keep track of. But the major ones do get dedicated attention/screen time, making it easier to get to know them better.
  I don't really have much to say about the plot, which is also very enjoyable. The worldbuilding and characters alone is enough to pick up the story, in my opinion. Overall, this is a wonderful tale that is definitely worth picking up!
  ---
  Now for the specific scores!
  Style: The style is good, where it's overall easy to follow along, but sometimes it can be a little difficult. But it's only like that on rare occasions.
  Grammar: It's great! Errors are generally unnoticeable, and even when they're there, they don't affect the story much at all.
  Story: The story is really enjoyable, but it has a bit of a slow start before ramping up to the really interesting parts.
  Character: I love the characters! The main (and many side) ones each have distinct personalities that make it easy to remember them even if their names aren't :P (though the main ones are easy enough)
  Overall, this is a great story you should definitely check out!