T Virus System

Self-Published

Community Rating

Description

I currently recieve a big system after drinking a wierd looking water. I can level up with this system. the only issue i see with it is that i am a virus. my main goal is to infect people and destroy them

Information

Status
Hiatus
Year
2019
Author
tvirusSystem

Tags

ACTIONFANTASYADVENTUREANTI-HERO LEADDRAMAMULTIPLE LOVERSSECRET IDENTITYWAR AND MILITARYHIGH FANTASYSTRATEGY

Royal Road Stats

Rating
2.4/ 5.0
Followers
57
Views
7,371

Chapters(8 total)

Reviews

No reviews yet. Be the first to share your thoughts!

Community Reviews(2)

  • KanukaiRoyal Road
    ★★ 2.0
    Not sure what to say as i have only read the first chapter.
    But from what i have read. Honestly, I lost the will. Not sure about the age of the author, but i think that he/she is very young. Like almost every new sentence would either start with I or my. don't get me wrong here, there is nothing wrong with it.
    But there is no flow at all. It all seems robotic or systematic. (If you get what i am trying to say. If not then...*sigh* idk)
    It starts with a very very bland description of the mc and the cultivation world that he lives in. Again, alot of personal pronouns. I don't have anything against bad grammer because i think that the author has time to change it.(only been out for a day)
    Anyway, i think that the author can change stuff and what i have said isnt helpful at all.
    (First review
    Wanted to sound smart but secretly... * sigh* idk
    Did i do good???)
  • terrythor46Royal Road
    ★ 0.5
    It feels robotic and doesn't really inspire readers to continue on. In the first seven chapters, the MC doesn't experience any setbacks despite not really knowing how to use his newly gotten cheat. imho, he should of failed a few times before successful infecting or having his infected killed a couple of times.
    Too many system prompts within a chapter. Way too many. This is probably the place where I say show don't tell because it mostly is just telling what he just did, but not get into details of he did.
    It also suffers from overusage of pronouns and mainly just the MC's thoughts. It is extremely bland as nothing happens around the MC and the readers only have the MC's thoughts. This doesn't help the story at all. I would suggest limiting the range of the infected by the MC's abilitiy.
    Also it feels like the infected are powerful. One infect vs a rabbit i can believe, but getting into one vs twenty and one vs fifty is really unbelievable. The cheat ability is pretty much the problem as it really has no limits in the beginning which makes the story feel extremely stagnate since it doesn't feel like the MC will grow in any way.
    Another thing that sort of brothers me is about how unbelievable this cultivation world is. Its really passive and maybe it's also due to how fast the story progress.
    In my honest opinion, this feels like a skeleton of a story. It sets a good idea, but it is extremely barebones. If the author ever decides to add more details and hardships to the story then it'll probably be better, but for now it's mostly just telling and not enough showing.