Souls Unlimited Online: An Over-The-Top VR Comedy.

Self-Published

Community Rating

Description

Special Thanks to my Friend Fuwari for making the Cover Art!

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An over-the-top comedy set in a VR game. Follow two + more idiots fumble their way though the game, and through their lives.

The outside setting, outside of the VR that is, also happens to be an actual Utopia as I envision it. Others might not think it is, but it's the ideal world far as I'm concerned. It's complete and total wish fulfilment on my part, I know, but I wanted to make something where everyonecanbe happy and live a good life. Not just the main character because they are OP. Because let's face it, would any of us be the main character? I reckon not.

Souls Unlimited Online. A brand spanking, asscheeks reddening, new VRMMORPG that boasts of its promise to give each and every single one of its players, from the dumbest to the dumb, a Unique Skill of their own!

Such a premise, so enticing!

Riveting!

Mouth-watering!

So many VR gadgets immediately drenched in fluids of all kinds!

Enter Fira Dragonir. A very eager player with a dragonoid avatar being followed around by a scantily clad robot lady who is actually his system avatar, an AI assigned specifically to him. He ignores everyone else to instead talk to her!

Is he destined to go down the path of the edgy solo player who is very obviously overcompensating!?

But just then, a new challenger appears! Enter Gothra, a player with an avatar that looks very normal, a somewhat rarity in the age of The System where anyone's body can be freely modified as they see fit. But one look at her system avatar and you'd question if this goofy-looking character really belongs to such a normal-looking woman! A man with a very buff and large body, covered by a bear fur suit, then wearing a gothic lolita maid outfit on top of that bear suit, and donning a gun strapped to his shoulder as the final touch.

Wow, that's a lot! Slow down Gothra! Use some of that creativity for yourself!

This very likely duo found each other, taking the entire world of Souls Unlimited Online by storm! They said so themselves, so it must be true!

Follow their heroic destiny as they forge their bonds, discover the realms, vanquish their foes, and sometimes do stupid shit!

Ok, they do the stupid shit the most. Everything else is optional, actually.

But despite what others may say about them, no matter how many stares or cheers they may receive, none shall stop their rise as their names are forever engraved in the anals of history.

The Legend of Gothra and Fira: The Two Dumbest Unique Skill Users!

THIS WORK DOES NOT CONTAIN HARD SEX SCENES. Only soft ones. Very limp. Mostly played up for laughs, and specially gags.

Release Schedule : M x W x F

Chapters(31 total)

Reviews

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Community Reviews(3)

  • WaurpelRoyal Road
    ★★★★★ 4.5
    I want to start to say that I really dig your story! Great world building and even better characters! But full confession, I almost dropped it halfway throught Chapter 1.
    So why did I almost stop at Chapter 1? Well, to be extremely honest, the introduction is just very weak and doesn't represent your story well thematically or stylistically.
    To point to specific issues:
    - I couldn't tell when Fira's thoughts could be understood by Ceraphism as though he was speaking to her and when the thoughts were trully just thoughts.
    - Too much exposition. Don't get me wrong, your world-building is nice, but I would slowly introduce it instead of shoving down readers throat (which you already do in later chapters, so it really doesn't feel necessary here). A specific piece of world building that felt too early is the age of the protagonist. It's really interesting! Don't get me wrong, but the impact of later chapters (i'm thinking 8) lose a bit in value by this information being already common knowledge to the reader. If it had been introduced just then, it would have been way more of a "Whoa! Really??" moment.
    - It isn't representative of the story and fails to hook me in :/
    So why did I stick to reading after? I just really like the characterisation of Fira an Gothra. Both very silly and over the top, but also have a soft underbelly that as a reader I can't wait to slowly discover as the story continues!
    Keep on writting!
  • IanFlatRoyal Road
    ★★★★ 4.0
    Starts fast. Bang, we're in a game.
    "Everyone gets a Unique Skill" is a strong way to introduce the appeal of the story/gameworld. It also differentiates this from many LitRPGs, where skill trees are available to anyone with the prerequisites. Plus, 'System Worship' is … curious.
    The dialogue is completely dorkily overenthusiastic, but given the author's note it's also intentionally dorkily overdone. And the synopsis does say, "Some idiots fumble around an MMO" so I cannot complain.
    The similarity between them is interesting. I would've expected contrast, to add conflict, but oddly similarity kind of does the same. Nice choice.
    I can't tell where this is going, but it does a great job capturing a certain awkward, babbling sort of forced online cheeriness. It's so breathless! I'm too old for it, but I do wonder if at some point the bubbliness is going to calm down into something a little more grounded ... and then what will happen next.
  • Luke ScheffeRoyal Road
    ★★★★ 4.0
    Okay, I can definitely say that the story is entirely over the top. Everything from everyone always yelling to how the characters are not acting in an even remotely measured way is entirely over the top. This story honestly seems like a written version of an anime. In my opinion, the way over the top bit has had a serious negative effect on the story, and should probably be toned down.,
    Style - I don't really like it. Again, it is way over the top and dramatic, and just doesn't feel either natural or fun to me, but rather feels stressful.
    Story - I didn't really get far enough in to judge the story, but from what I can tell, it is also rather over the top and dramatic.
    Grammar - I don't usually pay attention to grammar, but I did notice a few mistakes this time around, points deducted for that.
    Characters - The characters are again, over the top and dramatic. They seem like what they basically are, weebs who have immersed themselves in anime so long that they've forgotten  how to have a conversation without randomly yelling about things that they find even a tiny bit exciting. The way they talk just makes me didtinctly uncomfortable, like they are aliens pretending to be human.