Royal Flush [Card Based Progression! Doodle God! Combining Cards?!?!?!?!?!?!?!]

This story is inspired by [Hobo King] and [Aces and Jokers]. Those stories are on the Spacebattles forums and both feature the Worm universe which this does not. They're also probably better, so read them!

Readers can expect:slow-burnish storytelling, urban fantasy, three totally unique never before seen magic systems (that are 100 and TEN percent fleshed out, oh yeah we are getting like totally extra percent fleshed out), characters, an unlikable kind of main character, no fireballs (not even a small one, ok maybe one small fireball), I like to write wacky magical things, like really strange magical things, it'll get weird asf!

If you like:Crunchy progression analysis, interesting powers, very odd characters, dialect, lingo, jingo, probably off-kilter cultural discussions,A WHOLE SWATH OF LGBTQ+ CHARACTERS,a story that takes place in LOS ANGELES, the best city in the world FYI, beach bums, celebrities gone amiss, gardening?, fennel soup, every single possible God and deity I could scrounge up with Wikipedia and university religion classes, and all sorts of other things.

Get ready for:An author who edits their work after uploading... Who's grammar is inconsistent and odd... Who sometimes likes to throwing funky words in sentences just for the giggles...

Iona's teachers described her as homely, her Mom described her as "could use some work", some random dude on the street described her as "Ah God awful ugly disgusting." She's ugly, in a world which loves beautiful people. So she decides to change that, with a little bit of blood, and a ritual gone slightly awrong...? She summons a magical deck of cards, to make her beautiful.

This world has been bumbling around in my head for quite a while, I've tried maybe a thousand pages of different stories, world's, ideas, this is the one I've stuck with for the longest. My approach has been essentially treating my fictional world's as the Gu in the jar. Won't explain that reference.