Partial Hearts

Self-Published

Community Rating

Description

In 1700s England, Thomas Waltz and Christine Octania have been courting for years and are ready to devote their lives to each other. After a series of unfortunate circumstances, Christine is forced to marry Thomas’ older brother, James. The two have much to learn if they want to put their distain for each other behind them. This love triangle soon collides with the brewing of the American Revolution, and the newlyweds soon discover some shocking truths about those closest to them. Can the couple learn to coexist while war is upon their country and relationships?

Information

Status: Hiatus
Year: 2024
Author: SabrielJimison

Royal Road Stats

Rating: 4.3/ 5.0
Followers: 1
Views: 4,200

Reviews

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Community Reviews(1)

GhostDragon11Royal Road
★★★★ 3.5
This story is a welcome relief from the barrage of Systems, Isekais, and other such fantasies on this site. The story's writing style also opens in a unique and descriptive "classical book narrative" sort of way. This lends itself to feeling more relaxing to read when compared to styles that chop ideas and dialogue into many single lines that come off as robotic and uninspired.
The author does a great job of using evocative language and flow in narration with a pacing that starts well, but ends up being very rushed. By chapter 10 or so, micro-sized chapters and missed opportunities to tell the story at the same depth as the opening plague this story's potential.
Grammar wise this story is mostly fine, with a few places such as such as James' thoughts not being clearly formatted for clarity... or the many breaks within chapters for frequent scene changes feeling distracting.
The characters feel very realistic in some of their behavior and simultaneously way too accepting of fate or circumstances without putting up any physical or even internal/ mental fight. The prime example of this is in the opening chapters where the MC's just accept what's happening far too easily, but later on show very realistic empathy towards each other. Overall the MC's feel relatable to an extent, but could use more "fleshing out" in terms of thought processes and what drives them to say, think, or do what we see.
TLDR: This story's style and plot has lots of potential, but rushed narration and short chapters kill the flow. The characters have uniquely relatable elements, but struggle to stay realistic under the speed of the narrative.
Try out the first few chapters to see if you like the concept and then mark it for later to give the author the opportunity to rewrite so the story feels less rushed and more immersive. There's plenty of room for the story to grow and I want to see this one succeed!