Mystic Nan

Self-Published

Community Rating

Description

Note: Currently undergoing rewrite, we'll be back soon!(If you enjoy this story, it would help immensely if you consideredvoting for it at topwebfiction, thank you.)

Nan Beauchamp, like many youths of the year 2000-something; will live, work, and die as less than a footnote of a footnote within the abridged history of unremarkable years.

This suits her fine.

Too bad about the truck that turned her into paste, then. Luckily, or unluckily, fate deigned to give the poor girl another chance to make something of herself in a bizarre universe brimming with magic, spaceships, and... giant talking spiders?

This "second chance" seems less than ideal.

(A web serial import from Wordpress)

Information

Status: Hiatus
Year: 2017
Author: Maromar

Royal Road Stats

Rating: 4.8/ 5.0
Followers: 28
Views: 19,864

Chapters(13 total)

Reviews

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Community Reviews(1)

InferiRoyal Road
★★★★★ 4.5
This story is good. The writing is clean, the characters are developed, and the premise is solid. That said, I believe this could be a 5-star novel with only a bit of work so I'm going to be nitpicky.
This story reads like a slice of life novel with no driving conflict behind it, like most slice of life novels tend to be. Normally, that would be fine because the novel would be supported by an idyllic setting of 'growing up' or 'a summer in high school'. This one is set in the middle of an intergalactic war with animal people, giant spiders, and spirit magic. While slice of life in such tense circumstances might sound intriguing, the tension of precisely those circumstances is missing. This can be felt through most of the aspects of the story.
Character
Every character speaks and acts with care for each other's feelings and situations as though they were running into a friend at the grocery store rather than interacting with fellow soldiers in a bloody war. With a few characters, this is great. Soothers whose entire job is to blunt emotion and heal injuries care for mental health? Perfect. So does everyone else when it has been implied that sometimes these positions are forced upon them? Not so. In fact, it might be an easy way to solve this if you had the character's personalities reflect their jobs. The gunner might have a very direct and anticipatory personality for example. The only truly unique personalities we see are Vera and the playboy bunny guy. (The bunny guy that is a playboy, not a guy that is really into Playboy Bunny) Again I'll reiterate that the characters are well developed and kept me interested, they simply are too similar to keep fresh.
Story
Driving conflict. The single easiest way to breathe new flavors into a story is to introduce a villain. In this story that could be done in maybe three sentences plugged into a few different chapters. There was a guy that needed to have his torso reconstructed because of a parasite #spacelife. This is creepy