Memories (Completed)

Self-Published

Community Rating

Description

Jacob woke up in a hospital with no memory of who he is or how he got there.

He realised very soon that he had lost more than his memories. His girlfriend, who was with him, was murdered.

He is now out to find the person responsible and take revenge.

But how difficult will it be when he can't even remember the person who he has lost or even anything about himself.

Author's Note: This will be a short story, and I plan to finish it soon. I used to hate when stories were left incomplete. So I promise not to do that.

This is my first story ever. So please provide your feedback in any way you can. Enjoy the story

Information

Status
Completed
Year
2021
Author
Invictus21

Tags

ADVENTURESLICE OF LIFEROMANCE SUBPLOTMALE LEADSHORT STORYMYSTERY

Royal Road Stats

Rating
4.5/ 5.0
Followers
22
Views
25,397

Chapters(40 total)

Reviews

No reviews yet. Be the first to share your thoughts!

Community Reviews(10)

  • AJ_WhoRoyal Road
    ★★★★★ 5.0
    It was my first read on Royal Road and was fairly gripping and easy to read at the same time. The chapters were nicely broken down. I enjoyed the overall pace at which things were moving.
    Would recommend it to anyone looking to start something new.
    Please continue to publish, will look forward to reading more from you.
  • EnjoyLifeRoyal Road
    ★★★★★ 5.0
    Came across this storg over the last couple of days in thr latest releases and decided to give it a try.
    And I'm glad I did that.
    Though the grammer could use some improvement in the initial chapters, it get better after the first few chapters.
    And th author makes it up for that with the quality of the story. You are put into the deep end of the pool from the first chapter and it gets better from there.
    Liked the simple approach of the narration.
    But the best part was the ending. Really loved it. Made the overall story brilliant.
  • Farisahamed123Royal Road
    ★★★★★ 5.0
    The novel starts ok. But keeps getting better. First two parts was ok but last 2 parts were really good. Glad I gave this story a chance. The ending was really good. Definitely worth reading. I read the whole thing in one go. Should definitely give it a try if you are considering it
  • IgneusRoyal Road
    ★★★★★ 5.0
    Writing this at Chapter 15 - The impression so far- quite fluid narration, no unncessary lags. A bit more description of the scene, character emotions etc would help the reader to 'feel' the story more.
    The story line seams to be quite good and the characters solid. The better informed opinion shall be added at completion of the story.
    There are a few grammer mistakes now and then, but nothing grave enough to spoil the meaning of the sentence.
    To anyone reading the review to find if you should be reading this story - Go ahead, you won't regret. Its a nice, comfortable read.
  • KevinADavisRoyal Road
    ★★★★★ 5.0
    Read the first 11 chapters. Intriguing start with a solid introduction into Jacob. The writing and dialogue has a quick pace.
    Story: The situation is developing as the chapters progress. Intriguing dilemma for Jacob. The development with Michael fills in some of the missing pieces. The diaries as well.
    Style: Dialogue is good. I have a clear sense of the characters but not of the surroundings. The dialogue is solid, but I would want to see the story and setting as well. Pacing keeps steady.
    Grammar: I'm not skilled enough to identify the actual issues. There did seem to be places that would work better grammatically.
    Characters: Jacob has been developing clearly, especially during moments of interaction with other characters. There is little internal dialogue so the flaws and assets are simple and I’ve yet to see any direction in arcs which is normal at this stage of the narrative. I can empathize with his situation. Michael develops quicker. Mary seems a bit thin as far as a character, but I’m not sure how much of a part she’s going to play.
    Overall, a good read that I'd suggest. The situation I look forward to learning more. The few chapters I've read have left a solid interest in the mystery and dilemma.
  • world_wandererRoyal Road
    ★★★★★ 5.0
    The start of the story is interesting. I finished 2nd chapter and I am already intrigued about how he will return his memories and why his girlfriend died.
    From what I read, I guess the story will be in detective genre. I haven't read anything in this genre here on RR, so it looks like heaven's will.
    I like it. Will follow and continue reading.
  • scostRoyal Road
    ★★★★★ 4.5
    Memories is a solid mystery story that makes great use of its characters and structure to weave an engrossing mystery thriller.
    Story: By far the strongest elements of the story is the mystery. Without getting into spoilers, the story remains an engrossing read throughout, managing to leave the reader guessing until the end. The ending specifically is pretty well done. I did not see it coming and the twists in the story kept me on my toes. The structure of the story was quite good. The use of flashbacks sandwiched between present day plot was a great way of presenting the story and made it very interesting to piece together.
    Grammar: a few grammatical mistakes throughout the story, but they did not impede my reading experience.
    Style: This is probably the weakest component of the story. The prose is incredibly utilitarian, which can be a stylistic choice, but is to the story's detriment. A lot of the dialogue serves primarily to convey plot information and does not convey a lot of character. This is not helped by the lack of decription of mannerisms during dialogue - it's very back and forth. Jacob's character works the best in this regard as he comes of as direct and makes the dialogue work for his character.
    In addition, while the utilitarianism of the writing kept the pace fast which I enjoyed immensely, there were moments where I was left confused and my reading interupted. An example would be the religious differences between our leads. Jacob's christianity was mentioned half way through, many chapters after it became a central element to the relationship. Priya's religion is never mentioned. I assume it is Hinduism, but it was strange that it was never addressed or introduced.
    Character: Jacob's character works quite well and he has a good, consistent voice. The other characters suffer a little from their dialogue being mainly used to convey plot, but they do get more developed as it goes on. In the end, the supporting cast was pretty good, just needing a litt
  • Chaos JesterRoyal Road
    ★★★★★ 4.5
    I read every last bit of this story. Commented on every chapter with a quick statement to track my thought process. And holy crap.
    This story is how good mystery/thriller is written. Great characters. Great suspects. Perfect ending. The characters play their parts well, and they absolutely stay true ti their personalities, for better or worse.
    Sometimes the dialogue or grammar is jilted, but the author welcomes feedback and is also their first story. It's enough to take you out of it for a moment, but can be fixed easily by going through and making the proper edits.
    The story itself is well set up, well thought out, and THAT REVEAL was a masterpiece. This took excellent thought and effort, much like the effort put in my the MC about his studies. Threads were created and tied up with an amazing efficiency.
    Personally, I would love the flashback arcs seperated by present day chapters to break up a bit if slog and keep readers into the mystery. However. The overall story stands on its own strongly.
    I would also explore the Inspector's character a bit more as well as Mary's relationships with everyone.
    I know this was published closer to a year before this review, but Invictus should be highly encouraged to continue exploring this genre. There's a natural talent there just waiting to be honed.
  • BullerRoyal Road
    ★★★★★ 4.5
    Old review:
    I can't say I fully understood what I read, and maybe that was the intended effect. The guy lost his memories, for christ's sake. There is nothing that should make sense. And... that emotion gets carried over very cleanly, the guy not really knowing much of anything, forced to piece things together as he goes along his life.
    Haven't read the book in full, but I wonder if I should put away a few hours to do just that. I recommend it. 5/5
    So... I read it all. Every last word, every last chapter, and... I have gained a newfound understanding of what this story had to offer. I thought I understood the general plot after those first four chapters, yet it really does change over time. Things changed throughout it all, and I must congratulate the author for that.
    But, what is a review without breaking it down a small bit, starting off with the style. Memories used multiple POVs, more later in the story than anything, giving the reader a more in-depth look at the world, whats happening, and how the people are reacting to it. As an example, the ending wouldn't have been what is is now without the detective getting their share into the script. For that, I will be giving this story a 4.5/5 for that. I felt it was done beautifully. but there were still some formatting that I had some issues with, most of all being the way that we were told who was in the main focus at that point.
    Grammar is another point I would be pointing at here. It isn't terrible but it isn't the best, This here might actually be the one point which hasn't changed for me throughout reading this thing. While the general structure and all is valid, the author has a smaller problem with getting the tensing wrong at points. It's not enough to get an anerusims, but it was enough to be noticeable. I suppose it could be due to Grammarly or other editing getting it wrong, so I won't be taking this too hard. Another 4.5/5 here.
    The story now. For me, this is likely the hardest thing to get through. It's.
  • AlexaLeeRoyal Road
    ★★★★ 4.0
    N.B. As someone who worked in Traumatic Brain Injury, I may not be the best person to review a story based upon an accident leading to memory loss. I found myself comparing Jacob’s experiences to my real life professional experiences.
    As a new author, I think that Invictus is off to a great start. There are a few initial teething issues but this story has just the right amount of mystery and intrigue to keep you reading.
    Style: The POV jumps between Jacob and Michael (the inspector) which allows for the reader to get a much clearer picture of the situation. Some journal entries are included however it is not clear that this is what they are. It would be worth going back and further emphasising this to make sure that the reader does not miss anything. Additionally, it seems to jump from the past to the present tense sometimes a little randomly. It might be a good idea to be aware of this whilst writing. There is a bit of an issue in that there is very little description and whilst I do enjoy a more minimalist style generally, this story leaves me wanting more.
    Story: The story is good. There is an interesting premise and mystery is woven throughout very effectively.
    Grammar: Mostly fine but there are a couple of missing periods, apostrophes or strangely worded sentences/phrases.
    Character: I have some issues with the realism of Jacob’s situation because I think that, based on experience, he would have more ongoing issues than just some bad memory. I think it might be worth reading more into the impact of traumatic brain injuries to weave more authenticity throughout. Additionally, I think that this story would benefit from more emotional involvement too. Jacob seems a little detached from the situation, as do those around him.
    On a whole, I think this is a good story but by adding more realism and more emotions into it, you could make this truly great and heart breaking!