Free Flailing

Self-Published

Community Rating

Description

Gio is an asteroid miner with a heart bigger than his head. Left by his parents on a colony on Mars at a young age, he must make a journey of self-discovery when a shady character appears with an offer to join a game that turns his life upside down, and his universe inside out. He must choose between becoming a divine warrior or something more sinister.

Information

Status: Hiatus
Year: 2023
Author: Spinning_Flail

Royal Road Stats

Rating: 3.2/ 5.0
Followers: 8
Views: 5,080

Chapters(18 total)

Reviews

No reviews yet. Be the first to share your thoughts!

Community Reviews(2)

Emilie MillieRoyal Road
★★★★ 4.0
Well, that was a strange experience, but here we are. Let me preface this review by stating that at the time of writing, only four chapters are available. Therefore, there's a great chance that by the time you're reading this, everything I mention might have become obsolete.
Usually, I go through the usual individual scores (style, grammar, and all) while evaluating and justifying my rating. However, today I won't delve too deeply into that (although I will touch on it briefly).
So, let's begin: This novel is weird, especially when compared to what we typically find on this platform.
Firstly, in chapter 01, the formatting is... odd, if not completely off-putting. Fortunately, that can be easily fixed if the author wishes to do so.
Furthermore, the story sometimes feels frantic, while at other times it appears strangely sluggish. There's something happening here, but the way it unfolds often makes you feel like the whole thing is being narrated in a breathless manner, as if by a child summarizing events. Chapter one is a prime example of this. We're initially introduced to an interesting world, only to be abruptly whisked away. Ideally, we should be given some time to become acquainted with the narrative, but instead, we are hurried along. Honestly, a significant portion of chapter 01 feels more like a character summary found on a wikia page rather than an actual chapter. Therefore, I highly recommend addressing this issue. In my humble opinion, it could be resolved by removing a chunk of the first chapter and distributing it across the upcoming chapters.
In addition to that, I must voice my complaint regarding the use of dialogue in the format of (X: *say something*). It is not pleasant to read, especially considering that as the author, you have demonstrated the ability to write dialogue without resorting to this format (which you did in some instances for unknown reasons).
The characters are fine, although the frantic and ever-changing plot and locations make it q
Five6212Royal Road
★★★★ 4.0
Free flailing follows the adventures of an asteroid buster, Gio in a game world as he tries to find himself and a way to earth.
Style score: Rated 4 out of 5. The style is a well written one, and it helps immerse the reader in the story, but I had to take a star out because of its inconsistency and little to no descriptions of the world/surroundings. The style inconsistency came about at the ending half of the four chapters currently out, the style of writing changed from what it began with, and it leaned towards the “telling rather than showing” phase; I want to believe the author was exhausted which caused them to lean towards a faster writing approach; if that’s the case then let me just say this: there’s no need to rush to publish author, take your time and relax and write, releasing daily will get you on the rising stars with enough views, but it’s the quality of the work that’ll make readers stay, so always give out your best!!
Story score: Rated 3 out of 5. It’s still too early for me to tell you how good the story is, but the current chapters out are moving at a fast pace and I believe we’re getting to the main action with the goblins invasion very soon. The story is filled with mystery, action and a fired up mc. It’s written well, and if you clicked to check this story out, I’m sure it won’t disappoint.
Grammar score: Grammar checked out perfectly, rated 5 out of 5. If there was even any form of error, well I missed it, I was here to read the story not proofread, so if you’re here to enjoy the story not to nitpick on the author’s works, you might miss the little things just like me, but if you do see anything, then kindly let the author know, I’m sure they’ll fix it.
Character score: Rated 3 out of 5. My best character is Cash. I see him as much more of a 3D character than the rest, even though he’s had a shorter appearance. The story is all about the the mc, Gio’s character growth, so I see him becoming better in the future, and like I said, we’re just 4 c