Foreststorm

Self-Published

Community Rating

Description

Ves'ra is born in a small tribe of kobolds in the middle of a huge forest. She is happy with her life until several members of her tribe start disappearing. She sets out on a journey to find those responsible.

Information

Status: Hiatus
Year: 2019
Author: Irrelevant

Royal Road Stats

Rating: 4.4/ 5.0
Followers: 972
Views: 353,124

Reviews

No reviews yet. Be the first to share your thoughts!

Community Reviews(10)

Aki-chiRoyal Road
★★★★★ 5.0
I seriously like this novel and would actually like to help make it better, but my grammar is already worse than the author's, so I might as well do a review instead.
I must say now and here that this novel is not perfect, but that It also is one of the best I've ever read for the simple reason of how the author did the development and pacing of the story. The realism in it just gets to you and punches your face in a way you'd be hard pressed to actually notice the difference from it and a punch from life. It could turn perfect if the fantasy elements turned higher and the realism was maintained, but that is more of my personal taste. While the characters are still not that developed, the idea of a society with different individuals does seem to be very well transmitted. All in all, I'd recommend it to any of my non-existent friends if they somehow turned real, but the weebs reading this will have to do, cuss this author deserves more attention
CaptainLoserRoyal Road
★★★★★ 5.0
so I’m not smart enough to figure out the advanced review but I feel this story is 10/10 would read again it just a tun on fun the only problem I have is that I cot up with it
magical heartRoyal Road
★★★★★ 5.0
this is fun you should come back to it. I think a great story.
slatsauRoyal Road
★★★★★ 5.0
Really enjoying this story. I enjoy stories from a non-human perspective and the author makes great efforts to keep the thought processes and ideas of the Kobold familiar but different from ours.
Very well written, excellent update pace and just plain good fun.
fanobodyRoyal Road
★★★★ 4.0
As of ch33
There is a bit of Marie Sue in the mc but...
Magic is done right
Story is interesting
Funy moment
Background story that add dimention to your world
Rate 4.5 in hope you do your best for the rest
FlerpDooseMishRoyal Road
★★★★ 3.5
Review as of chapter 25.
This is a story that I enjoyed overall, especially at the start, but seeing how things are turning out as of chapter 25 I feel like the story is going slowly downhill.
Style:
Not bad, but not all that good either. One problem I have is the fact that you are TELLING instead of SHOWING.
Grammar:
I haven't seen too many obvious mistakes, but there are, as some of the other reviews pointed out, times when you use the wrong words that look similar to the one you're trying to use.
Story:
The story overall is pretty unique and quite nice. The world isn't pulling too many of the overused tropes, and you have added a few unique features as well, especially to the magic system.
Character:
Here's where most of my problems with this story lay: the characters. I'd rate this story a 4.5 out of 5 for the first couple chapters, but after Ves'ra had met up with the humans the characters feel less and less relatable/able for you to put yourselves in their shoes. Characters speaking with each other are just that. Speaking. No descriptions, adverbs, nothing! It ends up feeling like we're watching two badly voiced NPCs interacting in Elder Scrolls Oblivion.
Also, Ves'ra has started to show signs of becoming a big Mary Sue. She's super unique and talented, everyone suddenly respects/love her for being a talented mage even though she is a kobold. 0 discrimination at all. I would have thought that one of the hurdles she'd have to overcome was discrimination, but it seems like no one bears any ill-will towards her whatsoever.
Once again I'd like to say that this series is a pretty good series. I believe the author can easily spice up the dialogue and fix his grammar, but I hope the author doesn't take Ves'ra down the Mary Sue "OP MC that everyone absolutely adores".
MokanRoyal Road
★★★ 3.0
I'm usually pretty tolerant of grammer issues...until they start seriously distracting me from the story. Typos are fine, I can read right past them. But when you use entirely different words, I start to get confused and annoyed. Example: "wind" instead of "wing".
The actual story is pretty good and the author's portrayal of a Kobold perspective is excellently done. However, the magic system is generic and nothing special.
If the author spends the time to comb through the chapters to remove the more obvious issues and make the story flow a bit better, I think this story could really be something great.
TheOneTrueHeroRoyal Road
★★★ 3.0
Review as of chapter 43.
Simple power fantasy of a monster race protagonist. I think this is probably the first or one of the first stories the writer has ever made.
Conversations between characters are brief and usually are about what the protagonist did or what she needs to know in the short term.
The main character is kinda Mary Sue. She is the smartest (even as a kobold). She can assasinate spies from another empire THAT IS PREPARING FOR WAR accidentaly. She kills people very easily and without remorse, but is never called out on it. Even in the last chapter, i thought she would finally be in trouble for that but no everything is fine!
Grammar is not the best, but also not the worst on this site. Mixing up than and then happens a few times.
Honestly for a first attempt on writing a story it's not that bad. The hunts the main character goes on are fun to read and the whole thing with her being influenced by her memories as a human could become interesting.
levitysoulwitRoyal Road
★★★ 3.0
Got 55 chapters in, not a lot of reason to keep with it. The story started great, but after a while she just got OP and why do I want to read about another Mary Sue? And I love love love the way the character was portrayed early in the story, such a unique flavor to the underappreciated non-human female POV stories (it's a niche genre, but my favorite).
The grammar was fine but the prose was boring, which is a shame because the world-building felt pretty strong and could have kept my interest if the MC grew in a different direction. The dialogue was also a big hangup, felt stilted almost constantly in later chapters.
CazzTeteRoyal Road
★★★ 3.0
So good grammar
For what i read, agreable story (chapter 23)
But i think the big problem here are the dialogue, they are lifeless. They are monotone, no characters are differentiable with their speech. Just an exemple : A talk then B talk and it can be like this for 8 paragraphs. It is missing description like : A talk "showing her row of bright fang in glee", A finish talking, then "in a sage tone", B talk.