Faraway land

Information

Status

Hiatus

Year

2020

Author

Max The Sunset Enjoyer

• Home
  Nov 25, 2020
• Deceive
  Nov 6, 2020
• Life beyond death
  Nov 2, 2020

Reviews

Community Reviews(3)

• D.N. NewynRoyal Road

  ★★★★ 4.0

  Faraway Land is a good and ambitious attempt, especially for someone whose English isn't their first language. It takes the concept of reincarnation and (pun intended) gives it a new soul. What I really like about this book is that it aims to have more complex sentence structure more seen of Western style novels. There's a lot to be desired grammar-wise, but the author is taking steps in the right direction.
  The setup of this story is fairly classical and standard. It starts out with a prologue that builds up intrigue into the first chapters setting up normalcy. With a bit more craft, we can totally see this story getting somewhere substantial.
  Regarding grammar, the author needs to pay close attention to the general rule of adding 's' after a word, whether it be a verb or a plural or singular form of a noun. Some sentences, like 'through the waves he can be a scream', are grammatically correct, but they just don't make a whole lot of sense.
  I do think the chapters are a little bit too short for Royal Road's standard. Most Royal Road readers expect the chapters to be at least 1,000 words long, so do keep that in mind.
• KayTeaRoyal Road

  ★★★★ 4.0

  I think I'm going to voice the same opinion everyone else has: The grammar is questionable. English obviously not being our author's first language makes for strange phrases or awkward sentences. There's quite a lot of tense-drifting which also could've been fixed if the author did a thorough edit before posting. Spelling errors which would be minor if they weren't so egregious e.g. "thank mom" instead of "thanks mom"
  What I can give the author is that although he has his flaws in that, his dialogue construction isn't too bad. Everything sounds like it should be, and if he has a reader that can tolerate this amount of mistakes I can see something being brought out of this.
  But the main problem is a lot of the ideas of the author are getting shot down by the amount of mistakes that are introduced on a decent amount of paragraphs per chapter.
  Now the author hasn't posted many chapters to give a thorough enough review, but the best advice would be for this to be given a couple passes of edits before hitting the post button. It's not horrid, just needs an edit since the author does believe that he/she can write in the english language.
• LyRoyal Road

  ★★★★ 3.5

  Excluding all the grammar and spelling mistakes made, excellent, it has a rather original concept and the style of the writing was enjoyable to read as well. The characters are rather flat but at the same time livey I don't really know how to explain it but some sound like they are forcing their personality.
  Now including the grammatical mistakes. I just have to take that english isn't your first language? The verbs not matching subjects, this came a LOT. Second paragraph first chapter, blood began to spills, blood is uncountable, you can't say things like 1 blood, 2 blood etc. so spills needs to be spill. And pouring down. you can't use an ing-form after and, in this case it should be, and poured. And finally reaches his eyes=>and finally reached his eyes. You have to keep the tense in which you use the verbs chronological or consistant. After the first chapter this happened a lot less often but there are still a lot of errors with verb and subject or the tenses. However the vocabulary used is quite good, not something you get from an average writer.
  Also, wasn't the main character John? Or did his name change in the second chapter or is it a new main character. You should clarify that.