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Community Reviews(2)

violescenceRoyal Road
★★★★★ 5.0
Dragon Fruit has a unique premise I've never considered or read a similar adaptation of, and the author's passion for the series can be seen in the storytelling and worldbuilding. It's not your average hero's journey, and each chapter will have you curious for the next. I highly recommend checking this out!
SiliconWolfRoyal Road
★★★ 3.0
TL;DR - I'm not hooked.
Ok, so the grammar is fine. No complaints.
The style is fine. Nothing breaks the story flow or breaks immersion.
I don't know what the plot is, though. I don't see a goal or a strategy. Since I don't have any idea where this is going, I have to give it a low score in the story metric.
And then there are the characters. To put it bluntly, if the story dropped, I wouldn't care. Out of all 22 chapters I read, the main character has spent all of them depressed or terrified. And that is understandable. I'd be terrified if this happened to me. But I'm also not a very interesting person, and neither is the main character. I thought the shadebringer would be interesting, but the revenge I thought was the goal has turned into active stupidity or a liar deliberately messing with the main character just to hurt him.
As someone who has only managed to write 6 chapters of a story, I'm automatically impressed by anyone who can do better. However, I don't find any of the characters interesting. I don't love them. I don't hate them. I'm not fascinated by them. And I'm extremely unhappy with the other reviewer who rated this story highly, as I kept expecting to find a chapter that would hook me.
You've written a story about a bland office drone. And you've done a good job! Unfortunately, the main character is still bland. And that's not a fun story to read.
Some suggested improvements:
1. give the main character more than just two emotions. As I said earlier, the main character spends nearly the entire story either depressed or terrified.
2. give us characters that don't have dramatic reveals. Yes, you did a great job on all of the dramatic reveals. But that just means we can't trust any of the characters, nor can we connect to them.
3. Is this a grimdark story? If so, you need to add that to the story tags. If it's not, you gotta do something about what I've read so far. It's really depressing. That stuff about the healers? The fabl

Dragon Fruit

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Chapters(29 total)

Reviews

Community Reviews(2)