Demon's Sinistra

Information

Status

Cancelled

Author

D.N. Kato

Reviews

Community Reviews(3)

• King J ColesRoyal Road

  ★★★★★ 4.5

  You've done well establishing conflict and a faulty political system within the world of your story. Your character's backstory and status allows for us to realistically expect them to provide change for their kingdom, and keeps us intrigued on how the main characters will develop over the course of the story.
  Rose and Mira aren't your average archetype of nobilility, they have clear aspirations and goals. They are not blinded by loyalty to their empire (not totally anyway) and see the clear flaws in their system which they plan to rectify by coming into power. You see this in the first chapter, along with the supernatural element in Zeluhn and how he creates a sense of familiarity with the "other" in this story. The characters are ones we can admire and want to see more of.
  I do however hope to see much more development from characters such as Mira, and learn more of characters like Ilyana and how their relationships with other characters will factor in how the story will play out. Without taking advantage of the things we dont know of the characters and working on going into their personalities, their fears and put them in situations which their beliefs are challenged and where the reader can emphatize with them, it can come off as the characters being "flat". Give them their own moments of personal growth.
  You're prose is decent and is growing steadily. Your work has already shown me several examples of how to develop my own prose. It has an air of professionalism to it.
  However there are moments, especially in scenes of high action and movement where its hard to get a grasp on what exactly is going on. Imagery is good, but I would recommend toning down on the the amount of language you use to describe whats going on if there is more than one subject, where there is a lot of movement and etc. While it may be clear in your head, it is hard to put that on paper and realy it to others. Sometimes, simplest is best so that you can allow the reader to fill in the blank
• BoredBeyondBeliefRoyal Road

  ★★★ 3.0

  This is based off of A2 currently, and is rating it as such.
  Story was good initally but the mc practically bows down to his 'Lover'
  She is rediclousy snotty and likes to claim that its her land even though she isn't the current ruler!
  She also ignores the fact that 'Claiming land' is simply a concept, human,beast, or demon can go around and say that they own land as long as they have methods to protect it.
  Main issue is A2, if author has the chance a rewrite might be nice but I'll have to drop it at this point as her stuckup attitude is really annoying, especially after he saved her life.
• MaleficentBeautyRoyal Road

  ★★ 1.5

  Decent sketches. Better than the cover.
  Technically adequate writing, but overly descriptive and unedited.
  Constant focus on who/what the characters are looking at, and how.
  Example below makes you wonder if the author read his own prose:
  Rose looked at Ilyana with an expectant look of concern.
  Disregarding style, characters are stereotypical, and story generic at best.