Delving For Fun And Profit
Self-Published
Community Rating
Description
Thomas Wyll strolls through a peaceful forest - or so it looks. Truthfully, it isn't very peaceful, and soon he will face monsters from another reality. But he will persevere. After all, his future career as a professional Delver is at stake.
This is a short story written for fun and practice. If all goes well, the presented world and MC will appear in a longer form.
Information
- Status
- Completed
- Year
- 2022
- Author
- Tener
Tags
Royal Road Stats
- Rating
- 3.5/ 5.0
- Followers
- 1
- Views
- 1,207
Chapters(3 total)
Reviews
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Community Reviews(1)
- Maaku Yuujiin KurosubiiRoyal Road★★★★ 3.5You have done a great job of setting the scene and creating a sense of curiosity and wonder in the reader. You have also introduced the main character, Tom, and given some hints about his personality and background. The writing style is clear, descriptive and engaging, with a good balance of narration and dialogue. You have done a good job of developing Tom’s character and showing his cunning and resourcefulness.
You could use more varied sentence structures and transitions to avoid repetition and monotony. For example, instead of starting several sentences with “The wall was…”, you could use phrases like “In addition to that”, “Moreover”, “However”, or “On the other hand”.
You could show more of Tom’s emotions and thoughts as he observes the city and its people. This would help the reader connect with him more. You could add more details and examples to make the city more vivid and realistic. For example, describe some of the sounds, smells, or tastes that Tom encounters.
Keep writing.