City on the Void

Self-Published

Community Rating

Description

Waking up not knowing who you are is bad enough, but drowning in a city you can't recognize with creatures you don't know? It's much worse.

And then she finds out she is also the one called the Suitcase Killer. Not only is she a known serial killer, she also has a hefty price on her head. This is the situation Ms. Indigo finds herself stuck in.

In a city where money is everything and the absence of death means any methods will be used to make it, having a hefty bounty on your head is not a good thing to have. Doubly so when the hotel decides to collect the bill she owes them in blood.

Updating Tuesdays and Fridays

Information

Status: Hiatus
Year: 2022
Author: saithorthepyro

Royal Road Stats

Rating: 4.3/ 5.0
Followers: 21
Views: 7,765

Chapters(18 total)

Reviews

No reviews yet. Be the first to share your thoughts!

Community Reviews(1)

WaltTheWizardRoyal Road
★★★★ 4.0
Reviewed at Chapter 2.
Here I am, 48 hours after this piece was posted. As far as the overall score is concerned, it's pretty fine. Obviously, reviewing at this early a stage makes it hard to speak to the story as a whole since very little of what has been planned has been posted.
The Good:
The style. Good lord. I'm not sure I've read anything with quite as interesting a premise as Noir-Isekai with Junji Ito stylings. While I am a sucker for fedoras and trenchcoats, I also shouldn't gloss over the monster designs. The weird 'monsters' alone may make me tune in, just to learn more about them. From fedora wearing bugs to pigeon imps, I simply love the weirdness.
The story. It is very early to attempt to review the story, so please take this with the grain of salt it deserves. The story is good. There is very little authorial rambling. Pyro seems to have a good idea where the story needs to move and is moving it in that direction at a good pace. Once again, this is a place where the weirdness that I love shines through.
The not as good:
The grammar and prose. This is my largest complaint. The grammar was fine for the most part. However, during description dense sections I found myself having to reread sections to understand what was happening. This is a problem I also have with professionally proofread works though normally not as bad.
The characters. We're at 3-ish names characters and all three of them are people I want to learn more about. The main thing stopping this from being a higher score is simply length. There has not been enough time to determine how well written these characters are. From what I have seen, I fully expect this score to change for the better but it does lose something due to having read only the first two chapters.
All in all this is a promising start to a weird-noir-horror story.