Blood Demon's Retirement

Self-Published

Community Rating

Description

The story has been taken down for publishing to Kindle Unlimited. If you're interested, you can read themhere.

Also Available on Audible!

Civil War had raged on the Al-Shan Archipelago for the past four decades, only recently coming to an end with the enthronement of the new Emperor.

This is not his story.

The Blood Demon, renowned general of said civil war, was tired of all the fighting and politicking that had described the last four decades of her existence. All she really wanted to do now is to go out into the world and see the many lands from her father's stories.

Thus she retired, and went and did exactly what she wanted.

This is the story of what happens when you toss a (retired) war machine with somewhat lacking common sense into an unsuspecting world at peace.

Chapters will range from 1-2.5k words, scheduled for release every day from Monday to Friday.

First time posting a story on Royal Road here, hoping you folks will enjoy.

Expect:

-slow going slice of life with occassional faster paced action

-world building

-detailed anecdotes on the world, its races, the magic system, and whatnot every now and then

Do not expect:

-romance, other than maybe some passing mentions

-politics, again, barring passing mentions

Any comments, reviews, and criticism will be much appreciated.

And thank you for reading.

----------------------------

This story is my original work and only posted on the Royal Road and Scribblehub websites. If you should find this story elsewhere or under another name, please let me know.

Also please don't be too hard on me when I make occasional grammatical mistakes, English is my third language after all. XD

Edit suggestions are very welcome though.

Information

Status: Ongoing
Year: 2021
Author: Avitue

Royal Road Stats

Rating: 4.4/ 5.0
Followers: 1,351
Views: 259,659

Chapters(34 total)

Reviews

No reviews yet. Be the first to share your thoughts!

Community Reviews(10)

Consistent MilkRoyal Road
★★★★★ 5.0
A pretty good light read. Cal's retirement up to chapter 5 has been rather slow-paced but filled with some interesting experiences and interactions.
Style: As a reader, I had no issues with the style. It is not as well developed as some other stories I have read on this site, but it is good enough to immerse you into the story. Nothing too fancy caught my interest from the writing style. The scenes are composed in a good enough fashion, the descriptions are simple but effective. The dialogues are written well. Overall, the writing style is good, but it has been pretty simple up to now. None of the areas of the writing style shows much depth, but I think that will improve as the story goes on.
Story: Up to now it has been a pretty simple story of a powerful warrior in retirement experiencing the world from a new point of view. There are many interesting things she experiences on her journey though and I like the world the author has been building. Each chapter has its own 'major' event to read through, but an overarching hasn't been revealed yet apart from the fact that this is a story about Cal's retirement.
Grammar: Nothing came up that broke my immersion, but nothing interesting came up either.
Character: Cal is an interesting character, but I like the side characters more, to be honest. She is somewhat not well developed up to now, at least not enough of her psyche has been revealed or her characteristics defined.
Chaos JesterRoyal Road
★★★★★ 5.0
I've got to say, the synopsis does not lie. This is the story of a warrior who goes into retirement after the civil was she is a part of is over.
Those fun chapters inbetween serious, dark, plot filled chaoters in other fantasy novels? This is that. We get to explore this wide world through Cal's eyes as she discovers what the peace of the world truly is.
With many new places to see and things to experience, it is only improved by Avitue's vivid detail and creativity, and just enough humor and fantasy to keep a reader hooked.
KasidyaRoyal Road
★★★★★ 4.5
I find this interesting, in that the protagonists journeys show off different races, cultures and wildlife, while also covering enough of her backstory to show why she interacts with people in different ways. I expected a grittier story and was pleasantly surprised to find that, yes, she intends to see the world, and that she shows a caring side rather than being suspicious and cynical in her dealings with others.
There are a few grammar and spelling mistakes, but considering this is the authors third language, it is well written indeed.
Poached_EggRoyal Road
★★★★★ 4.5
Appropriately for a story about retirement, the pacing of this story is decidedly laid-back. Personally, this type of story isn't typically my cup of tea, but I could absolutely see the appeal in this story for someone who enjoys this sort of thing. If you're looking for a decidedly unique slice of life story with a twist, then I think this is worth a try.
My main complaints with the writing itself would be the exposition dumping. There's a lot of information that's frontloaded in the first two chapters, and then it just kind of abruptly stops and the story meandres for a while. I haven't read far enough to know how the exposition is throughout the story, but I could definitely see a lot of people who would have been potential readers being turned off by those first few chapters.
My other complaint would have to be the typos. It's not so much the typos themselves, but rather how they affect the writing. They have a tendency to be placed in the worst possible spots, and they often completely change the intended meaning of a sentence via a missing or misplaced word. Things like that take a typo from barely noticeable to distracting, so it's definitely something to look out for.
Hi_Im_RenRoyal Road
★★★★★ 4.5
What a fun first couple of chapters! I gotta say, it was a really pleasant ride. I should've expected it from a fiction with retirement in the title. Still it was really good. English is your third language? Why does it seem better than mine?! There was only one error that I spotted and it was clearly just a typo.
Why am I docking half a star? The prologue didn't do it for me, too many exposition dumps that really made my eyes glaze over. I was worried the rest of it would be like that too, but the following chapters had really good gradual world building. So nice save!
Now I'm going to listen to come sail away by Styx.
Iain GrubbRoyal Road
★★★★★ 4.5
An enjoyable read, which as advertised follows the journey of a retired powerhouse as she explores a world rich with unique creatures, systems of magic and interesting races and cross species.
Some very unusual classes and beings pop up as the MC's exploration takes us on a bit of a Hungry Planet journey through monsters, cultists, bandits, goblins with odd fetishes, pirates and the odd homage to Monty Python. (Note: the cultists, pirates and bandits were not canabalised as part of the storyline.)
Lacks the extensive stats and powerups of a LitRPG as the main character is already at the top of her game, or close to it, which lends the story some of its charm. Which is not to say there is a lack of conflict or personal growth.
chiku1605012Royal Road
★★★★ 4.0
I am not the one to give a very detailed review, but the overall story is definetely a slice of life focussed on Trying out various Dishes around the fantasy world. It also has some action scenes which might cause people to think its an action style story, but it is actually a slice of life at heart.
The characters are good and while could use some more details from past to flesh out their motivations and thoughts, it is mostly well done. There are really too many characters though, I sometimes got a bit confused when picking the story after some interval.
World Building is nice and seems be well thought out. Not all aspects are known but we seem to know enough and that is fine for a story of this genre.
GarrdorRoyal Road
★★★★ 4.0
My title basically says my entire opinion of the work; the MC goes somewhere, eats the cultures food, learns about their ceremonies and clothing and housing, then moves on. It's just like a brief overview of stuff an anthropologist would write about in their diary, but with orcs and elves.
It's perfectly fine, very slice of life-y, and I've read quite a chunk of it so please don't think I'm being disparaging by describing it this way.
There's just a lack of tension from the "action", which is probably mostly by design, but less excusable is how shallow most of the character interactions are (IMO).
AnnjiRoyal Road
★★★★ 4.0
This fic surprised me. It does not score particularly well on any of the core pillars of storywriting by any means: characterisation, plot, worldbuilding, etc. However, what it excels at, I find, is being a page turner, and—by extention—a chapter turner. It achieves this in two ways: 1) Shorter chapters, so easily readable in a few minutes; 2) The writer dishes out exactly what you expect from the synopsis/description, and that is commendable to me.
There are faults, yes, and many of them; that is to be expected of someone who is writing in their third language, however. The grammar is not great, dialogue feels very samey or uninteresting, and personally I feel like the main character does not act like someone who has such an infamous reputation. The author could do with trimming down some of the fat to streamline chapter further, as I feel like there's a lot of unnecessary information in many paragraphs, and feel like the easily-readable nature of this web novel could be made better with shorter chapters.
But: it's clear they are writing this for the fun of it and is relaxed writing this relaxing slow-burn story, and this shines through with how nonchalant the writing is. It's very simple—there's lots of dialogue, quite a bit of worldbuilding (though at times there are info-dumps), but plenty of character interaction that will satisfy most RR readers of slice-of-life I feel.
To me it feels like an even more relaxed version of Data Dragon Danika, reminds me a lot of it. I am usually someone who thinks, 'hard pass,' to web fiction that clearly does not have much—or any—polish, but for some reason, I find myself saying, 'Just one more chapter.' The easiest way I can describe it is that it is akin to comfort food; you take one bite and you just can't stop, or help yourself, and it helps greatly that each bite (in this case chapter) is just simple and short enough to be a pleasant experience through and through.
There's no deeper meanings, no complex imagery or difficul
Thor AegirRoyal Road
★★★★ 3.5
Set in a peaceful fantasy world where cross-species marriage is common, this is the story of a war weary veteran that set to walk the worldly path.
If the universe is fine, i find the story over focused on culinary matters. The mc has a character depth that the author does not exploit. The author hint to the guilt of the mc and to PTSD without really writing about it.
The great universe with a complex cultural make up made me think of "the slime farmer" novel at webnovel.com . Both stories are foodie oriented but the "slime farmer" author know to depict the depth of the inner struggles of his mc.