Adaptability

Information

Status

Hiatus

Author

AJQuaccs

Reviews

Community Reviews(1)

• HellholeEnjoyer96Royal Road

  ★★★ 3.0

  This is my first review here, so I apologize for any inconsistencies. Rambling also.
  As for criticism, what must be addressed first is that, despite there only being a prologue in which a prologue doesn't do what a hook or lead does, the lack of a first chapter and only the presence of said prologue makes the story harbor very little interest. Yes, the lucidity of it all is eerie and some questions can be raised on "what on earth is this place?" or "this is high fantasy?" but a prologue of this nature is meant to be read continously into the first chapter; on its own, it doesn't raise concerns strong enough to persuade continued reading. So, when such of a reader comes to the end where,
  "He cried and cried until he could no more, his eyelids drooping from exhaustion. He felt so tired and numb and before he knew it, he went out like a light."
  There's just a big hole leading to the beginning, where anybody may ask "what now?" One extraordinary detail like the 'dust' may act as intriguing idea, but it's used more as a tool to connect to the character (in which no character development happens but regression, backstory, and further reader-character exposure, which is natural for a prologue).
  As for the positive, I'd say the setting is effective enough to draw a feeling of dread: the silent uncanny contradicting the breeze of nature. Personally, as I'm still unable to discern a bad story from one good, I can't say educatedly whether it'll appeal to others.
  Therefore, if you were to write another prologue in a style similarly to this, please include a first chapter which goes into further detail of the setting; perhaps create questions, anticipation. Because regardless of what you write, the truth that you want to express: allure comes precedent.